Blundering Brown Bankrupts Britain

Before boring Brown began badly bludgeoning British Bulldogs, brainy bullshitting barrister Blair boasted booming Britain. Big bangs banged, bloated bureaucrats blossomed, brilliant bankers blindly bet banks' billions, "Buy! Buy! Buy! Back-hander big-wigs bloomed beautifully. Brain-dead boozy busy bees bought boundless bid bargain basement bargains between beers. Buzzing brokers bayed.

Bluffing Blair backed-down, Brown became Britain's boss but boom became bust. Bread-and-butter businesses, believed bell-weathers, belly-flopped, banks became blocked, bankers borrowed biliously but blocked business borrowing. Bank-of-England base-rates bottomed, basic buying broke-down, balance-sheets buckled bankrupting British business. Bull-markets became bear-markets. Blood baths bombarded business boards. Bitter back benchers bickered. Business basics backfired. Benefits ballooned. Billions! Billions! Bedlam! Balance-of-Payments breech broadened bewilderingly.

Brown's buddy ('Beloved'), bespectacled bashful budgeter, becoming brave, blatantly borrowed billions, bailed-out banks. Bewildered Britishers belly-ached, "Big British bills bankrupting bulldog's broods". Brown "Britainised" banks but Bradford-and-Bingley became bust. Barclays better! Brown blamed banks. Banks blamed Brown. Big banking businesses blue-printed, "Big bonuses!"
Beware Brown, belligerent British bulldogs bellowed, "Block-or-begone!"
Betrayed boiling Britons, blaming blundering Brown, bellowed, "Banish Brown's band-of-bandits". Blue banners began big bombardment. Big battles begin. Begone Brown. B-off!

Blair beamed. Blair's bride beamed. Brown blushed. Budget-maker bit bullets, Bank-of-England boss bossed banks.

Plenty of Clouds here thanks to Messrs Blair, Brown & Company but the Silver Linings seem light years away. Even with a conservative government in power, which seems highly probable next election, it will take years to recover and to remove both personal and national debt with which this government has saddled us - it is huge. Mr Brown, as chancellor, squandered billions in pointless government spending when the coffers were in surplus, through good conservative stewardship. He should have set this aside for a rainy day, so he was just as irresponsible as the bankers for getting us into this mess. Gordon Brown used to use the word, "prudent" a lot but quickly abandoned it as he borrowed more and more and more to spend more and more and more. The last labour government, when Dennis Healey was chancellor of the exchequer, did exactly the same thing and ended up going to the IMF with a begging bowl to save Britain. This time round under the Blair/Brown debacle a point worth mentioning is that when Tony Brown and his 'New Labour Party' took over they inherited an economy from the Conservatives so strong it took them 11 years to ruin it. The conservatives will have to do it all again and won't get much thanks for it. My, the British electorate have short memories, don't they?

Since this original publication I have received a personal visit and complaint by Gordon Brown. He agrees that the content is entirely factual but his complaint is that there was no photograph of him included with the text. Consequently this posting has been extensively revised to include the two photos and some more suitable words beginning with 'b' when I find them. As a matter of courtesy I have written a short sequel just for Gordon and Alistair which can be seen on the next posting.