Saviour of the World? Hmm! This week I received a complaint from Gordon Brown about my last blog. Whereas he agrees entirely with the content, he remarked that I had omitted to include a photograph of him. Sorry, Gordon, I did not remember to take my camera with me, as all good bloggers should do, always. Please remember, I am a beginner. Had I remembered and taken my camera and got near enough to actually take a photo of him several people have remarked that I could easily have taken a gun instead of a camera and shot him. He looks a bit 'shot' here doesn't he? Certainly someone appears to have spoilt his breakfast. Or maybe John Prescott took a swing at him.
In fact I looked for ages on the website for a flattering picture of Gordon and this is the best I could do. If you look now back to my previous blog you will note that I have endeavoured to put things right by adding this photo and one for Alistair Darling. I hope Gordon and Alistair will both be happier and, with that out of the way, feel able now to get on with the task of trying to rescue this country from catastrophe.
I thought it prudent to add a photograph of Alistair Darling since he is a major architect of the huge financial mess in which we live. As you can see, he is obviously trying to make a point of some sort and it seems as though this has fallen on deaf ears. He looks as though he is about to show his teeth to somebody - I wonder who is about to experience his wrath. Is it you, Gordon? Mr Darling seems to be behaving just like John Prescott did just before he hit or punched someone. It must be something to do with 'new labour' and the effect it has on people. Come to think of it 'old labour' had much the same effect, didn't it? I wonder what the labour party will call themselves now that both old and new labour don't work. Perhaps 'New New Labour' or 'Revamped Yet Again Labour' or 'Twice Dead but Resurrected Labour' or 'Honestly, this time labour will work'. I expect they will come up with something.
I have it by reliable authority that in his next budget Mr Darling will impose a severe tax on all bloggers because they are classified as 'not green'. His reasoning is supposedly that when all our computers are switched on and we are busy posting and communicating with each other in a highly civilised manner it is deemed that we all produce a huge carbon footprint, thus contributing to global warming. We are classified along with gas guzzling jets and four wheel drives! What a spoil sport he is. How dare he do that to us! I say vote conservative at the next election in protest. No doubt you were going to do it anyway.
Returning to the subject, Gordon expressly forbade me from adding a picture of Tony Blair to this post because he says there are far too many of him and Cherie in existence already and the grinning photos remind him of a couple of Cheshire cats. Couldn't agree with you more, Gordon. It gives me great pleasure not to include a photo of Tony and Cherie.
After agreeing to these two conditions I am very pleased to announce that Gordon has withdrawn the worldwide contract he ordered on me.