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Sunday 30 January 2011

Eddie Interlude

Hi folks!

I have been very busy outside BlogLand with various tasks including year end accounts, do-lists and volunteer bus driving I have not been able to serve a Sunday Roast or post anything new. I have a few roasts in the pot and I hope some new ones are sent in soon.

I thank my great friend Jackie for sending this video to me and I loved it so much I wanted to share it with you.

I love the dentist sketch and the naughty Stork stalking a Stork LOL.

I noticed tha Alan managed to escape and I expect Steve is running away as well. LOL

Hope to free up some time soon

Saturday 22 January 2011

The Sunday Re-Roast SULDOG

Time To Interview The Old Odd Ball, Soft Ball Again
Welcome to my Sunday Re-Roast - another chance to meet bloggers already roasted and provide them an  opportunity to review their original answers and to reply to some new questions I ask these days.  From time to time I shall I mix these Re-Roasts with new Standard Roasts to provide a bit of variety.

This weeks interview is with Jim "Suldog" Sullivan
who writes the blog, Suldog 

A very warm welcome to you Jim and all your followers
Gosh! . . . . it's scorching on that spit! . . . and here he is folks wishing he was a Blog Of Note.
What . . . he is a Blog Of Note. Hey! Congratulations Jim.

HEY FOLKS . . . Jim's a Blog Of Note
all together . . . .  "Congratulations!"

What's that you are holding this time, Sully?  Oh! . . . . so it's a magic wand now, is it?  Give it a wave and we'll see how you answered your original roast. Oh! You're looking a little concerned! Worried it might turn into something nasty and pink? No Ladies! don't look!! Oh, crumbs!! Tell a lady not to do something and she'll do it!! Remember Lot's wife . . . and Eve and the apple? On second thoughts it's a family show so perhaps you'd better just use your imagination or memory.  Now compose yourselves!! . . . . and let's get back to the interview.

Jim's original roast was by David McMahon on 24 May 2009.  Jim will wave his magic wand and replicate it for us or if you wish to see the original and read the comments press HERE but then please return for the new stuff.

Here's the first of the standard questions. Why do you blog?

Insatiable ego. I’ve always had a very high opinion of myself, even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary, so I figured everybody in the world would love reading whatever I typed.

Amazingly enough, while making statements such as the above, I’ve received very little in the way of flames. The folks who comment over at my place are almost uniformly kind and complimentary. That’s very nice of them, but, if they had any brains at all, they would have figured out that I’d have dried up and blown away upon receiving even one or two nasties. They could have done the populace at large a huge favor by manning up and throwing out a few insults.

If they had done so, I would have gone to bother someone else with my next hare-brained scheme; perhaps starting my own church or acting in pornos. As it stands now, my ego has been blown up to such mammoth proportions, there’s little likelihood I’ll stop writing. That’s too bad for the world, but I’m OK with it.

What’s the story behind your blog name?

I wish there was one."Suldog" is just a nickname I picked up years ago. My last name is Sullivan. Well, almost everybody at this one place where I worked ended up being called something-dog - Charlie-dog, Dave-dog, Fitz-dog, whatever. I’m not sure how it started, but it did, and since I was already nicknamed Sully, I became Suldog. For whatever reason, it seemed to fit me
more than most, and it’s followed me around ever since. Exciting, eh?

What is the best thing about being a blogger?

Seriously? The people you meet (not that you truly "meet" too many of them, but you know what I mean.)

I’ve developed many fine virtual friendships, and had the pleasure of physically getting together with a couple of the nicer folks. There are so many interesting life stories out there in the blogging universe!

(Really, I think that everybody has an interesting life story, but some just know how to put their story into words in more entertaining ways.)

The anonymity of blogging helps some folks, of course, but I’m one of those bloggers who doesn’t give a damn if everybody knows my real name or where I live. When I write, I assume that at least one person in my audience will have done the same stupid thing I’m willing to reveal that day. From the comments I’ve received, that appears to be the case. And it also appears that those people are exceedingly glad to find out that they’re not the only ones, so I guess I’m performing a public service of sorts when I admit to past indiscretions.

Anyway, my life is an open book. I figure that if someone really wants to dig up some dirt on me, they can. Therefore, I’m happy to save them the trouble. I figure if I write about it first, nobody can ever accuse me of hypocrisy. If you criticize me about any of it, though, I’ll jump on you with both feet. Everybody has things they’ve done that fall short of perfection and I’ll carve you a new one if you seriously think you can get away with being holier-than-thou in my presence.

I don’t know if that answered the question or was just a long-winded self-serving rant, but it’ll have to do.

What key advice would you give to a newbie blogger?

Post naked photos of yourself, if you’re a woman! If you’re the shy type, and aren’t sure about this advice, feel free to send the photos to me first for an unbiased editorial critique.

Aside from that? Be yourself, whatever that may be. If you have odd quirks, bring ‘em out into the open. If you have a style with which an English professor might find fault, don’t let it keep you awake at night. It’s your blog, not the professor’s. So long as you make yourself clearly understood, it’s all good.

(Despite the above advice, though, I’d suggest that you learn to spell. Style is one thing, ignorance another. You’ll lose many readers if you don’t know how to spell the second word in this sentence.)

Above all, have fun. There are very few folks getting rich from this. I’m certainly not one of them, so if you send me ten dollars – and, perhaps, those naked photos - I’ll be glad to give you more advice.

What is the most significant blog post you’ve ever read?

It was by Magazine Man. I’ve got his link on my sidebar listed under the heading "The Best Writer On The Internet", and I’ve never been given reason to back down from that statement. He’s brilliant. There are some truly good writers out there – you among them, of course – but I have yet to read anything by him that wasn’t utterly captivating.

Anyway, his parents died in a highway accident a bit over a year ago. They were on their way to visit he and his family at the time. He had written about them both, at length, previous to the accident, showing them to be interesting and lovable people, with faults in their pasts, to be sure, but that just made them more endearing in the present. I (and his other readers) felt a relationship to these good people, via his marvelous writing, so when he posted concerning their tragic deaths, it just sucked the breath right out of me. My stomach churned almost as much as it had upon hearing of the death of some of my own loved ones. That’s how good his writing is.

(To clarify: That single post, about them dying, wasn’t his greatest piece, but as a hideous denouement to all that had preceded it, it was as powerful an emotional response as has ever been dragged out of me by a blog.)

What is the most significant blog post you’ve ever written?

A Day (Five Of Them, Actually – All Saturdays) In The Life, which is basically my life story, condensed. I think it’s the best thing I’ve ever written, so if your readers go to my place, read it, and aren’t impressed? They may as well leave, since it isn’t likely they’ll find anything better if they stay.

Thanks for the opportunity to display my arrogant, ignorant, bloviating self, David. If you enjoyed reading this half as much as I did writing it, then you’re 50 per cent as happy as I was.

Well - that's what you wrote two years ago, Jim and interestingly enough you said you would answer these questions in exactly the same way today.

So - let's see what you make of the new questions.

Is there anything since your roast you are dying to tell the blogging community?

Yes, but I won't say it here. Yours is a family blog and I wouldn't want you to run afoul of the censors.

All seriousness aside, I'd like to say that I've enjoyed every moment of my interaction with my fellow bloggers. I'd like to say it, but I can't. It's been a miserable 5+ years I've been doing this, and I have come to the conclusion that I'm a self-loathing masochist.

Is anybody still reading? Oh, good. I'm glad you decided to stick around. Actually, I have some wonderful, intelligent, kind, and wholly fantastic readers. I only said the rotten stuff above to weed out the posers. Since you're still here, you're one of the good ones, and I thank you quite sincerely for making my time as a blogger a pure joy. You folks are the best!

Which two blogs would you recommend for roasting?

Well, I hate to limit it to only two, but I also don't want to copy my entire sidebar here and weigh you down, Eddie. Let me see...  My first choice of course would have been Knucklehead - He's an extremely funny man, and also quite erudite. He and I root for rival baseball teams - He, New York Yankees; I, Boston Red Sox - but, other than that, he's sane. But I see you've already roasted him.

So who else have I been reading for a long time, but hasn't already been roasted?

OK, how about these good people...

Shimp at Land Of Shimp - She writes some very funny pieces, and has one thing in common with me: she goes on and on and on. In her case she actually says something."

Buck, at Exile In Portales - A master sergeant, retired from the U.S. Air Force. Despite the reputation sergeants sometimes have for being tough birds, he's a genuinely nice guy. Of course, maybe he was a real bastard before he retired, but he's sweet as pie now.

And, for a third, how about Thimbelle, at Creeping Towards Normal? Fine writer, interesting and love-filled stories, and her family sends me fruitcake every Christmas, so the least I can do is pimp her out.

(Great, thanks for these recommendations, Jim)

Pick three things you can't live without.

The ability to express myself musically.

My main instrument is the bass guitar, but I'm somewhat proficient at drums, keyboards, six-string guitar, various percussion instruments and simple woodwinds. I can't begin to imagine how frustrated I would be if some accident befell me and I found myself unable to play any instrument at all. I let my emotions flow freely while playing. It's one of my primary emotional outlets. Sometimes, for instance, it's much easier to bang on the bass than to vent anger elsewhere.


I love to laugh. If you ask MY WIFE, she'll probably tell you that I'm the easiest man to make laugh in any audience of which I'm a part. Slapstick, especially, gives me joy. Anything that upsets the dignity of a stuffed shirt or a blowhard will have me rolling in the aisle gasping for breath. I adore sight gags - and the more elaborate and impossible-seeming, the better. Show me someone stepping into what appears to be a mud puddle, but then disappearing completely, only to reappear a few seconds later soaked through, muddy, spluttering and puffing his cheeks, and I'm useless for five minutes while I laugh. Anyway, make me laugh and you're my friend.

Yummy Food

I enjoy eating, a lot. I enjoy eating a lot of things. And a good meal involves not only the sense of taste, but also smell, touch, sight, and even hearing on occasion. I won't list my favorite foods, as that would take up pages and bore everyone to tears, but let's say that if I somehowng a lot of things. And a good meal involves not only the sense of taste, but also smell, touch, sight, and even hearing on occasion. I won't list my favorite foods, as that would take up pages and bore everyone to tears, but let's say that if I somehow found myself unable to enjoy food, life would become a very bleak enterprise for me.

(On the face of it, Jim, you appear to be quite normal and sane!)

If we were to make a movie about BlogLand, what would it be and who would you cast in the leading roles?

I think I would call it The Three Stooges Meet The Marx Brothers Meet Laurel and Hardy Meet Abbott and Costello Meet The Ritz Brothers Meet Wheeler and Woolsey and Clark and McCullough and Cheech and Chong, Who Carry On. The plot would be fairly much non-existent, but the laughs would be never-ending. Here's the cast listing:

Moe - Mushy
Larry - Craig
Curly - Knucklehead
Shemp - Shimp
Joe - Quirkyloon
Curly Joe - Jazz
Groucho - Cricket (or, perhaps for this role, Porcupine)
Harpo - Shrinky
Chico - Aglio, Olio, and Peperoncino
Zeppo - I'll take this one, as I appreciate him but nobody else might.
Laurel - Twinks
Hardy - Jelly (Twink's friend, and they really ARE something of a comedy team!)
Abbott - Buck
Costello - Matt Conlon
Harry Ritz - Lime
Jimmy Ritz - Michelle
Al Ritz - Hilary
Wheeler - Thimbelle
Woolsey - Magazine Man
Clark - Saz
McCullough - Moannie
Cheech - Mariann Simms
Chong - Brinkbeest
Sid James - Eddie Bluelights

I realize all of these are traditionally male roles, but I'm willing to see how the females do with them.

If anyone else wants to be in the flick, I suppose I could write parts for Burns Allen, Rowan and Martin, Fry and Laurie, The Two Ronnies, Lum and Abner, Bob and Ray, the casts of "Are You Being Served?" and "The Goon Show", and perhaps Nixon and Agnew, who may have been the most underrated comedy team of my generation.

(Jim, the mind boggles!!  . . . . such a mammoth production would surely require Cecil B De Thrill to direct, at least!   And thanks for the honour of being Sid James.  He's a comic genius!  Laughing at your casting for Chico Marx, and some others ROFL.  Hey! I didn't think you guys across the pond understood the Goon Show.)

If you could live your life again who would you be, and why?

MY WIFE. That way, I could fall in love with me and nobody would complain about me being too narcissistic (which they're no doubt doing now after reading this answer.)

(Typical Suldog cunning and logic LOL)

You have been given a wonderful talent from above. This causes you to make your mark on humanity and be world famous. In which area would prefer: a best selling novelist, a brilliant artist, a gifted musician, a fantastic singer, a charismatic leader, anything you choose, and why?

Well, since I'm already most of them, I'll choose the one thing I'm not: a best-selling novelist. But I'm not sure I actually want to be that, as it probably would be too much work. Let's just leave me being me since nobody else seems to want the job.

(Can't say I blame 'em - LOL)

If you were an ice cream cone, which flavour would you prefer and who would you most want to lick you?

I would be peppermint stick ice cream (with jimmies, of course, or perhaps you call them sprinkles) and insofar as who I'd like to lick me, I'd be satisfied with just about any, just so long as they don't bite my cone.

(Ah! you are at the grateful age as well, Jim)

Describe in one sentence your perfect day

I would be peppermint stick ice cream (with jimmies, of course, or perhaps you call them sprinkles) and everybody who wasn't tempted to bite my cone would lick me.

(Again . . . the mind boggles!)

If you were a fiction writer which one would you be and why?

What makes you think that anything I write isn't fiction?

(Thought most of it was fact, actually LOL)

What was your most embarrassing moment?

Being featured on your blog, thus far.

(Yup! I know what yer mean! but you are not the first to say it! My pet budgie did on his roast! - now carry on like this my friend and someone will give you an award and then you'll have to get your wand out again and be extremely rude to them!! LOL)

If you awoke to find you had changed gender what would be the first and second things you would do?

The first thing I'd do was play around and find out what everything felt like. The second thing I'd do - assuming that things felt nice - would be to find out just how much money I could make with my new equipment. If it turned out that things did NOT feel nice, I don't know what in hell I'd do for the second thing. Cry, perhaps.

(Think positive, man!! You have no other choice!)

Your turn to ask me a question if you wish.
(omg . . . what have I done? No doubt he's going to make a lame duck out of me yet again!)

Do you more prefer fondling waterfowl or dressing up as the Queen? What if I supplied the orange sauce?

Oops! That's more than one question, Eddie, so I suppose I've ruined my chances of getting an answer. Oh, well. I know, in your heart, you like both equally as much, no matter whether there's orange sauce or not. God bless you.

(That goes back to a post I did, long ago, in which I kidded Eddie unmercifully. He, being an extremely good sport, took it like the man that he is. In reality, Eddie neither fondles waterfowl or dresses up like Her Majesty. So far as I know, at any rate.)

May I have one more word here, Eddie? I hope those people who are just being introduced to me will send me some money, if they're men, and nude photos of themselves, if they're women. If they're neither, both. And I thank you in advance for your kind indulgence and incredulous stares. Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas indeed!  Actually I put my hand up to being late with Jim's Re-Roast so I will update his intentions and wish you all a Happy New Year on his behalf.
  Now about these wretched ducks and the Queen (and he forgot to mention Stanley Holloway, didn't he?).  Well Jim, all I can say is that I have documentary evidence that you became interested in ducks from a very early age LOL, and obviously this interest has turned into an obsession.  There he is folks, playing ducks and drakes in the kitchen sink! LOL.

What's up, Jim, can't yer find yer ducks? LOL

Well that was great fun, Jim. Thanks for appearing on the show and I look forward to many more encounters with my great blogging adversary.  Lots of banter, skirmishes, duels, slanging matches, wars, apocalypses. Bring it on, man and I'll be ready for you LOL. But now you are a Blog Of Note I think you might be able to think of a different insult for me other than the ducks - so there!. No, actually folks I like Jim a lot and we are great pals. . . . . . Jim, you're a ten out of ten guy!

OK - we'll finish by having a look at Jim's Blog Page . . . and see what rubbish he is writing about me perhaps! LOL

Today's Sunday Roast with Jim Suldog is the 145th
in a weekly series of interviews with bloggers from around the world ______________________________________________
This interview will feature in The Roll of Honour
for all published Roasts. To view press  HERE

Please keep your recommendations for The Sunday Roast coming.
For those who would like to know a little more about it, how it started, the nuts and bolts of it etc, press HERE

Wednesday 12 January 2011

Blog Land's Got Talent Awards

Hi everyone . . . . . welcome to my award ceremony called "BlogLand's Got Talent".  Today I have two awards up for grabs and the nominations are far too numerous to mention in full, plus there are several blogs who sadly no longer accept awards who otherwise would be on the rostrum - all exciting and wonderful stuff.

In August 2009 a very good bloggy pal of mine, Jackie, honoured me by creating and sending me her This Blog Kicks award. Jackie is a retired school teacher who's blog she names Teacher's Pet which is a private blog - thank you again Jackie.  I wonder - am I the teacher's pet or were you just trying to tell me I am a silly ass? LOL

There are three conditions to accepting this highly prestigious award.

1.  You answer five simple questions - these appear at the end of this post.

2. You pass the awards to at least four ot to as many fellow bloggers you wish, asking them the same questions or five of your own.

3. You accept another award as a sort of Get One, Get One Free promotion LOL.

This second award, Making Smiles On Faces, was given to me by the lovely lady with green eyes, Marguerite, at Cajun Delights. Marguerite has an excellent blog which portrays all the delights of Cajun culture, including her own wonderful recipes which are sinfully delicious, and she treats us to video clips of her favourite Cajun music to boot. But she keeps me wondering as to where she features whilst dancing on some of the videos - she loves to keep me guessing you see although I am quite convinced I had the right answer at least once LOL. Also I have to be good because if I tucked in to all her fantastic recipes I would soon resemble The Incredible Hulk. Marguerite is a good friend and has a superb sense of humour (thank God)

So without further ado I am delighted to pass on this award to the following bloggy pals.  Indeed ALL their blogs kick and they ALL put smiles on faces.  Please visit them and tell them Eddie sent you - I for one need to visit them more often.
I had the good fortune recently to interview Sheila on my Sunday Roast column. Her roast was highly popular and her devoted readers commented in their droves, demonstrating their appreciation of Sheila's superb blog.

Marguerite @ Cajun Delights
Well, Marguerite, I cannot award you something you awarded me, so just for you please take the This Blog Kicks award PLUS either a plate of fish and chips for your forthcoming Cook Book.
uggg! . . . . sorry about all the Ketchup!

OR this one given to me by the lovely Janine at Sniffles and Smiles in April 2009
but take them both if you like.
Now please don't forget to remove the giblets! . . . . and let me pull the wishbone with you LOL.

Ken @ Grumpy Old Ken
Obviously I am not the only one to enjoy Ken's blog - he was recently awarded Blog Of Note by Google. Many congratulations Ken - very well deserved. I particularly like your monthly feature Grumpy's Alternative News.

Moannie @  The View From This End
Also recently awarded Google's Blog Of Note I send my congratulations to a dear blogging friend and fellow Total Hip Replacement recipient.  We would be great in a three legged race I think, Moannie.  Recently her blog went astray into hyperspace but we are all fortunate it was found and fully restored.

Monica @ The Creative Beast
I am fortunate to have 'met' Monica recently in Blog Land and she agreed to appear on the Sunday Roast.  She is not a beast at all but is very creative and also has a wonderful sense of humour (thank God LOL)

A lady who calls herself "I" @ Happy Frog and I
Yet another recent Blog Of Note recipient and again congratulations, and also roasted.

Maggie May @ Nuts and May
For those who don't know Maggie is my sister and she has just forgiven me for throwing her Teddy Bear out of the window when we were little. Get Sam to help you nail your trophies to your side bar.

Betsy @ My Five Men
Another very nice young lady who I roasted recently. . . . but rather greedy with all those men! LOL.

Jinksy @ Nappy Notes
Another good bloggy pal with a great blog.

Mimi @ MimiinDublin
A lovely Irish lass who plays the French Horn and also has a great blog.

Angie @ Gumbo Writer
Another Cajun lady with a great sense of humour and an awesome blog.

So now to the questions:
Please note: one word answers not acceptable. Expound your ideas/answers in a formally considered written response of at least two sentences. LOL

1.  What came first - the chicken or the egg?

2.  Which facet of blogging do you enjoy most?
a) Writing
b) Visiting
c) Commenting
d) Reading people's comments to your posts

3.  Runner beans - do they really grow clockwise round canes in the southern hemisphere and counter clockwise in the northern hemisphere - or is this a load of tosh, they grow either way wherever they are?

4. What attracts you most to the opposite gender?
a) A good sense of humour, lashings of personality, charm and lots of wit
b) He/She is loaded with dosh
c) He/She is romantic
d) He/She has a fast sports car like a Corvette
e) Good looks
f) A cheeky smile across a crowded room
g)  Neither - please specify
h)  Other - I cannot imagine an answer to this one!!

(Please note you cannot choose ALL because he/she does not exist! but if you choose a) I will gladly email you my telephone number LOL)

5. What New Year's resolution did you make?

. . . . . . and
a penalty question to Marguerite, split into two halves!

6.  a) Have you written your roast yet?
b)  If not are you still on question 1 after 18 months? LOL

Can I bribe you to complete it with yet another award?

These questions, except question 6, are also open to ALL readers so please let me have your answers and my special prize is a free invitation to appear on my Sunday Roast interview.  Book early to avoid the New Year rush.

I hope you enjoyed your Christmas festivities and 2011 is exceptionally kind to you in every possible way.

Finally, I am starting the Sunday Roast again week end commencing 23 January.  My first will be a Re-Roast of Jim Suldog which should be great fun.