A VIEW WITH A MEMORY OF AMBULANCE DAYS

I was on Dial-a-Ride duty today and I drove one of my favourite passengers for his weekly hospital consultancy/appointment.  We arrived a little early to drop Don at the hospital and there was just time to show him one of my favourite views, overlooking the Avon Valley, just outside Bath. It was a lovely afternoon.  The River Avon runs along the valley, just out of site and so does a busy railway line and main road.

As we sat for a while talking and enjoying the view memories came flooding back into my mind of sharing this with someone else during my ambulance days.

I had just picked up an elderly lady from one of the hospitals in Bath to transfer her to another hospital in Bristol for treatment.  She was very distressed and not well at all but I could manage to transfer her from her wheelchair into a seat.  She was very anxious about her health and well-being and was very depressed and almost in tears.  

We got talking and I was able to make a connection and she told me the bottom had dropped out of her life, she had lost her husband a few years ago, her children saw her very infrequently and now her health was failing.  She had almost convinced herself that there was nothing left to live for.

She cheered up a little while we talked as I drove and I said because it was such a glorious day we would take the scenic route to Bristol.  I said I had time to show her a view which I liked very much and we pulled over and I lined the vehicle so she could see through the door. I remember it was a warm summer's day and I sat with her and said, "Just look at that! ~ you see, there are still a lot of good things left to enjoy!".

Her face lit up and she smiled and told me I was so kind and said she was so happy to share our conversation and the view.  We stayed there for a full 15 minutes and I said that the view is lovely all the way along the valley.

When we pulled into the Bristol hospital she seemed like a different person.  Her mind was taken off her troubles and at least she had found something to cheer her, albeit just for the afternoon.

This is why I loved the ambulance work so much, to touch someone, make a connection, and make them happier and how long did it take?  ~ just 15 minutes.

I don't know what happened to this lady, maybe she has moved on by now, but I often think about instances of magic like this, and many others.

The icing on the cake today for me was that while I was waiting for Don, I met some of my ex Ambulance Colleagues and it was great to chat with them over old times.  There may be a possibility of me working again in the service in a smaller capacity ~ I would love this.

RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS ADVENTURE 2015 WEEK 2

Welcome to the second RUK week, hosted by our own lovely Betsy at My Five Men.  The idea of Random Acts Of Kindness is to spread a little love to anyone by treating them to a gift or a service ~ Betsy suggests several ideas HERE.  Last week was very successful with an encouraging number of friends participating, showing kindnesses in a variety of ways.  At the foot of Betsy's post we are invited to link back to our own RAK post so we can read participating friends' posts, HERE.

This week I was fortunate to help two people, both during the course of my voluntary Dial-a-Ride driving, or relating to it.

The first RAK concerned an elderly lady who I took to a doctor's surgery.  She was a little late coming out from her appointment and I was getting a rather concerned the delay might mean my late arrival at a Nursing Home to pick up two people, a lady and a gent, both visiting their respective spouses.  As it turned out the lady emerged from her appointment and I helped her into the bus, explaining I would be picking up two more passengers on the way.  She held her chemist prescription and was rather concerned that she would not be able to get it to a chemist.  I said I would deliver it to a pharmacy on the way after we collected the others and to ask for it to be delivered to her.  I picked up the other passengers and then reached the chemist, leaving all three in the bus.  A very nice lady pharmacist said she could make up the prescription in just two minutes and was surprised I could remember the lady's address.  Anyway I managed to give the lady her prescription and got them all home.

My second RAK centred on a ladies hairdresser salon in town.  I had got to know two very nice ladies who owned the salon, Lizzie and Nickie. Every week I took an 85 year old lady to the salon and over the weeks and months I got to know them and we are good friends.  This week I explained about RAKs and asked how much they charged for a lady's shampoo and set and they said around £20 so I said I would like to donate that amount anonymously to pay for someone they might have in mind deserving a free hair appointment. Lizzie in particular had tears in her eyes and said she knew the exact person who could use this gesture. The lady she had in mind had drawn the short straw all through her life and in fact had a dreadful time in terms of nearly all aspects of her life and her daughter had tried to take her own life a while ago.  I was very touched when she was telling me this.

I called in the other day with baby Peter, as I do sometimes when they are not busy.  Lizzie explained that the lady was totally gob-smacked saying she could not believe anyone would do something like that for her in this day and age and it had caused her to restore her faith that there was at least some good still in this world.  Lizzie, in fact broke down crying and put her hand on my shoulder saying, "God will repay you when you get to Heaven, Ed".  I then learned that she is a believer, which gladdened my heart.

I am almost ashamed to say I did get an inner glow that I had helped someone, albeit in a small way.

SPECIAL TRIP TO THE ZOO

I was honoured recently when I was asked to drive a party of elderly residents and staff from a Residential Care Home in Keynsham to Bristol Zoo for the day.  It was their annual outing and we were all so pleased the weather stayed fair and that a good time was had by all.  Apparently one of the residents was so 'happy' she actually cried, seen here with a very kind and lovely staff member.

I count myself so fortunate belonging to an organisation which provides that level of service to the community, as indeed are the management and staff of Keynsham Dial-a-Ride.

I am a volunteer driver for Keynsham Dial-a-Ride and I took the party of elderly ladies in this bus, nicknamed Ivy, plus seven staff, who helped by pushing the seven residents in their wheelchairs.  Another vehicle took the wheelchairs and some staff members.

St Philip and St James Residential Care Home in Keynsham was formed over 25 years ago by Mrs Pat Clarke, who is a very good friend of mine.  I am so pleased she was able to share this delightful day with us. Not long ago she had a painful replacement knee operation and it is remarkable she was able to push a wheelchair.  Mind you with that lady nothing is as remarkable as it seems - she truly has a direct line to Heaven and she does incredible, almost impossible things.

Pat is a well loved and highly respected 'angel' in the community and she has helped so many people she really should be a saint.  My dear wife, Maria, worked for her and Pat treated her just like a daughter.  Pat and I are like brother and sister.

The day started at 10.30 and it took a while to transfer all the residents into the 12 seater bus, with another vehicle following. Fortunately Ivy is equipped with rear wheelchair access and a lifting mechanism and we were able to get them all abroad, transferred into seats and safely strapped in.

We arrived at the zoo and the wheelchair pushers, including me, were admitted free of charge: 

I took a few photos - some would say of my distant ancestors.

This one seemed to be hanging around for ages:

I was pushing the lady in the foreground, although the lady in the mid ground seemed more in tune with my jokes and you can see Pat laughing in the background:

There was not much doing in the lion's quarters - the two male brothers were out of sight from their main enclosure, sleeping which was disappointing.  So we headed for the penguin enclosure:

. . . . taking care to keep hold of my bits, of course:

I did not take too many photos of the animals . . . since I was pushing a wheelchair and it was sometimes difficult to break off . . . . but this chap seemed interesting:

We took a packed lunch with us and of course I was looked after as far as food and drink was concerned:

The time went by very quickly and we arrived at the restaurant and all assembled for a cup of tea and an ice cream . . . . here is the lovely Laura, waving my ice cream:

. . . "Only one dear!"  

Then someone else thrust another ice cream into my other hand and the day was so hot the ice cream was dripping all down the cone.  

"Help!! . . . I said as Ella arrived with a very self indulgent scone laced with raspberries and a huge dollop of Cornish Cream, insisting I should have some there and then!  

We were all in hysterics:

There was universal amusement with my inability to eat two ice creams at once without the contents running down my arm:

 "And don't forget your scone, Eddie!"

Then it was time for some more photos:

The two Polish girls, Sandra and Ali were amused with my feeble attempts to speak Polish - my wife, Maria spoke it fluently, but I managed to say a few things correctly, like "Sto Lat" meaning cheers or one hundred years, and "Dziękuję bardzo" meaning thank you very much.

The lady in mauve was a former user of Dial-a-Ride and I knew her very well.

Nice to see people enjoying themselves:

Just time for another walk around the grounds:

Ali and Peggy are waiting patiently:

Laura looks refreshed after her ice cream and so does the lady.

"Did I say something funny?"

One lady next to Sandra insisted on walking . . . didn't she do well?

Hey what about me?  

Who's taking a piccie of me?

Sandra obliged, thank you:

. . . almost ready for another look see at the zoo:

What a load of posers we are!

One more for the road.

A great day!

So glad it went well for them
Hopefully we can do another one soon

An unexpected DIAL-a-RIDE thank you!

I was surprised when I got to the Dial-a-Ride office on Friday.

I was presented with this award

Did I think it was just for me?

Well hardly had the thought crossed my mind when my good friend Ian, who runs the office on Fridays and also is a volunteer, was quick to point out he had one as well.  We 'rib' each other something rotten do us two, so I said,

"Come here, darling! and let's have our photo taken!"

"Oh Shit! I've forgotten my camera!"

There was raucous laughter as the swear box was passed to me and I said, "Gosh this is heavy, you lot must have done a lot of swearing - How much?"

"Twenty pence!"

"In that case I'll have forty pence worth, I said, "Oh bugger, I said Shit!"

(laughs)

The manager's wife, the delightful Julie, said she would use her cellphone and duly obliged, "Smile! . . . . .  cheese! . . . . . snap!"

She emailed me the photo - thanks Julie . . . . and Ian, get on with your work!

On seeing the result of Julie's handy work I said,

"Oh Ian! what a dreadful photo of you! . . . . . . !" 

"What do you mean of me? Just look at you!", he said.

We proceeded to banter each other and soon had the whole office in uproar with Julie and the manager joining in! 

 You see we tend to be on the jovial side - just look at Terry, the manager:

Mind you . . . .  two can play at that game if it's a hat fashion show you want:

But I would much rather see this hat on this adorable young lady who was the heart throb of the Ambulance Station and with whom I used to work whilst in service - you see we had a few perks in the service didn't we?

But I digress . . . . these are but distant memories of my Ambulance days and by now everyone is going to shout at me,

"Eddie get back to the present and get to the point?"

"OK"

As many will know I drive for Dial-a-Ride in my home town. I have worked there in a full time capacity twice, but now I am an unpaid volunteer driver, working for them every Friday. 

I just love it!

  We have three regular paid drivers and several other volunteer drivers including myself, plus of course Ian, who works in the office, manning the telephone desk and inputting appointments onto the computer.  Ian, like me, works just on a Friday.  In fact when I was working full time I used to call him "Man Friday".

Now, it seems Dial-a-Ride has two Man Fridays. him and me!"

Last year Ian and I attended a First Aid course held by two gorgeous paramedic ladies - unfortunately I do not have their photographs. 

It was a refresher course for me because I am well trained in such matters like CPR (Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation)

We practised resuscitating a non breathing unconscious patient using a manikin - after opening the airway by tilting the head back, 30 compressions, 2 breaths, 30 compressions 2 breaths . . . . 

The procedure has changed somewhat since I was in the Ambulance Service.

I was taught when entering a possible dangerous situation where a patient is injured and unconscious we should apply "Dr ABC" which stands for:

check for Dangers, check patient Responses, check Airway, check Breathing and check Circulation.

Nowadays the girls taught us this has changed to DrSHAB

meaning:

Check for Dangers, check patient Responses, SHOUT for help, check Airway and check Breathing.

They leave out circulation because if the patients airway is closed and there is no breathing then it will be almost impossible to detect any circulation.

"Eddie Get back to the point of the story!"

"OK"

The point is that sometimes I call Ian, Dr Shab and sometimes he calls me Dr ABC, and I make a point that he has no circulation! lol

The poor man has such a bad memory though because now he has forgotten who Dr ABC and Dr Shab are.

_________________________________________________________

All these HAT DISPLAYS remind me of a savage Vi-Queen I met on Jinksy's blog a while ago.  Geepers she is enough to put the fear of God into anyone, including Queen Boadicea, Maggie Thatcher and Ada Trellis.

  Yes, it really is Jinksy!  You really wouldn't think so after reading about that sweet and innocent lady I met last week and featured in my previous post.

Just take a look at this!  

What a battle axe!

HELP!

The full story about that one is HERE for those brave enough to read it.

______________________________________________________________________

Something more sensible next week - maybe!

A YEAR ON, A JOB WON, ANOTHER JOB WON AND JOBS AWAITING

(Man working hard - please interrupt at once)

Jobs are beckoning in the garden and the remaining member of 'the heavy mob' will soon arise from his inactivity and from the ashes to tackle some much needed  renovations, screaming at him whenever he passes them by. With the warmer weather coming it will be a pleasure to venture outside again and do some destructive and creative work. I'm not sure which I prefer, destructive or creative, but I do like using that power kango breaker.  I will post some of these projects as they arise.  

Also I have a major project at my daughter's and son-in-law's house in Bath to share with his mother, also a recent widow, just three months after my loss which was equally tragic. We have a large hedge to demolish and some extensive gardening alterations which we can share. Perhaps we should clone ourselves into a small army - boy, don't we need them!

On Saturday 26 April a year will have passed since my darling wife, Maria, was taken from me. We had been married for 40 years.  During her illness and when she passed I felt as if  I had been hit with a sledge hammer, and still do sometimes, but the distressing flashbacks are becoming less frequent.  Quite frankly, I did not feel like doing anything right up until now, since my heart was not in gardening or extensive house cleaning or in anything, barring the absolute essentials of life. Gradually I am getting my life together and I hope things will become a little easier once the first anniversary has passed.  But life is very lonely.

Last year was very difficult and I dreaded being in the house by myself, but fortunately something told me to contact our local Dial-A-Ride service last July, just two months after Maria's death.  I had worked there four years ago for a while and I was astounded when the manager said the day before a paid driver had walked out and would I be interested in a six week contract.  I said, "Yes, when do you want me to start?".  He said, "Tomorrow, four days a week!".  It was as if Maria had been bossing the angels about because I had been prompted to approach Dial-A-Ride at exactly the right  moment.  

Further, my son secured a job without even having to try!  He had been looking for menial work for about three weeks, with no success and he was getting a bit depressed.  He wanted something to earn some money while he studied for his Open University Degree. Out of the blue, my next door neighbour, who runs a computer company, approached him and offered him more than a job, in fact a career!  He loves the work and it is entirely complimentary with his degree work.  He is doing very well there and they are all pleased with him. Strange - I wonder if Maria somehow had a hand in that?  Also, the other day I was looking for a new shower curtain and couldn't find one.  Something prompted me to open a cupboard door and when I opened it guess what fell out all by itself and landed on the floor? Yes, a new shower curtain! Isn't that amazing! I would not have been surprised if  her handwritten note was attached to it saying, "What took you so long? . . . . . and here is a list of things you need to do!"

Anyway, that Dial-A-Ride job lasted much longer than 6 weeks.  In fact they wanted me for 5 months and I loved it!  It got me out of the house and gave me a focus and you will imagine what fun I had with the passengers.  They miss me dreadfully. because regrettably, there is not sufficient resource available for me to continue there as a regular paid driver.  Two ladies cried!  Several complained I was leaving!  But I still drive for them as a volunteer every Friday and I always look forward to that. It was rather similar to my Ambulance days with the interaction of patients which was nice.  Always I loved making them laugh. I am looking around for something to keep me out of trouble for about 2 days a week.

In October I was blessed with the birth of my first grandchild, Peter, who is now six months old and doing very well. He started life at 7 lbs and now he is 17 lbs and growing fast.  Hasn't he got beautiful big blue eyes?  He is so alert, lively and inquisitive and likes giving big, sloppy wet kisses - Aww! dribble, dribble!  He had his first piano lesson the other day, walking up and down the keys! What a horrible noise.  I can see he is going to break a few hearts later, can you?

It is such a shame that Maria did not see him - she was so looking forward to the grands. Yet somehow I think she is smiling as she looks down from Heaven.

So, hopefully I can soon start to enjoy life again to the full, and give it a TEN out of TEN

 Until the next time!

The Red Baron, A Christmas Party and Merry Christmas To You All

Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

It's the day of the party at our 'Dial-a-Ride'

We're treating the old folk this Christmastide
Three minibuses, including this one
Ferried passengers to HQ to have fun.

The weather was bitter, the wind blew and blew
But we soldiered on as the numbers just grew
On roads we skidded and round corners we did slide
But we managed our pick ups where 'ere they reside.

Yer can see Eddie wrapped up in a Bobble Hatter
With scarf  and warm coat as his teeth started to chatter.
The Red Baron bus started with loud engine noise
To pick up the old ladies and a few elderly boys.

Along icy roads just covered with snow
We had to be careful and allow time to slow.
Each bus had been skidding and sliding all week
Not the place to be if you're kind of meek!

Down one of the roads Eddie's bus became stuck
"Hell's teeth!" muttered Eddie, "just my luck!
I've got nine old ladies - I must get to the top
If I cannot do this they will all have a strop!"

"We'll jump up and down", said one, "try again!"
"Nay, please stay seated and with such notions refrain!"
"I'm 94!" was a lady's reaction
"You must think of how you can get some more traction!"

Said another, "Come on lad! we'll get out and push!
There's no other way to the top in this slush!"
Said another, "This is all exciting to me!
I've not had such fun since I was three!"

Eddie reversed down the hill in his little red bus
And charged from a car park without further fuss.
"Come on!" they all all shouted as they neared the top,
"The wheels are spinning and we think bus will stop!"

But Eddie put his right foot hard on the floor
As the engine revved faster and the noise was a roar.
Inch by inch they progressed climbing higher and higher
Until they got grip on the road with each tyre.

"Well done, Eddie!" the old ladies screamed
With delight on their faces and a smile to him beamed.
"One more to collect . . . a fellow called Eddie!"
"Not another!" laughed a lady, "for two we're not ready!"

We reached the pick up and had a surprise
A lady was waiting . . . was she in disguise?
"I'm a little confused I was expecting a man
My run sheet says Eddie . . . maybe a fault with the plan!"

"I've been called Eddie since ONE NINE FORTY FOUR
It's entirely true you have the correct score!
Now tell me my good man, what is your name?"
Said Eddie laughing, "It is exactly the same!"

"My name too is Eddie and since I was born
In ONE NINE FOUR FOUR that name I have worn!"
The two of them laughed as her seat belt was secured
And so to the party the bus load endured.

A good time was had with lots of mince pies
Good conversation and presents surprise.
The time went by quickly and the party was ended
So time to board buses and home journeys wended.

But on the way home we saw some of the sights
Of local houses adorned with bright Christmas lights.
There seems many people who like decorations
With seasonal flavour with their creations!

This was my last day at the Dial-a-Ride and many of my passenger friends are a little upset because we have grown to know and like one another. It was a pleasure to drive them, assist them onto and off the bus, carry their shopping and make their lives a little happier. They enjoyed having a little laugh on ocassions and to have someone there to whom they could have a little rant now and then.  I remember having trouble sometimes trying to get their seat belts fastened - some ladies were a little large and fortunately I had an extension seatbelt for such ocassions which caused a few laughs.  I am continuing on a voluntary basis for a while for two days a week.

Well I promised a new ending to Macbeth - I'm still working on it - the projects I give myself! LOL

I am very conscious I have not visited many of my blogging friends for a long time - I am a very busy dude these days and I do apologise for my absence - not sure whether I really do have sufficient time for blogging - real life does get in the way unfortunately.

I'll get the Sunday Roasts going again in the new year.

During my bus travels I found this little pony in a farm along a Lane called World's End Lane. LOL. The farm was at the end of the road and I had difficulty turning the bus round LOL

All together, "Ahhhhhh! . . . .isn't she lovely!"

"Cheers folks . . . . . down the hatch"

Like the graphic? - A little birdie sent it to me LOL . . . . Thanks.

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy and Healthy New Year

Finally, I'm feeling a little pleased today because one of my poems has been published in a magazine, New Forest NCT News for their Winter edition. The piece, a little naughty, is about the Cerne Abbas Giant
Some may remember it.

How To Remove Your Underpants Without Removing Your Trousers

I apologise for my recent lack of posts, other than Sunday Roasts of course. I have been extremely busy driving a red mini bus, nicknamed The Red Baron, three days a week for Dial-a-Ride at the local council. You may call me Eddie von Richthofen Bluelights.  My passengers are mainly little old ladies, picked up from home to the shops, Health Centres, Hairdressers etc. . . . . and to return them safely home, helping them with their shopping and on and off the bus etc.  Love the work but alas I shall soon finish because the council has run out of money - a common occurrence these days with cuts in government spending.  Shame for little old ladies who all love me of course and for me too because I love them and doing the work and helping them.



Anyway, I have an unusual post for you today - I feel it is something you just cannot wait to discover and try yourselves (joking of course!).  It is designed principally for the menfolk but you ladies too can join in if you pinch a pair of hubby's underpants and trousers whilst he is not looking!! Shhh! whilst he is asleep in his chair, pretending to be watching the TV, have a quiet practice and then when you have perfected the craft say, "Oi! bet you can't do this!"

"What?"

"Take underpants off without trousers being removed!"

"Yer joking! . . . Golly! . . . . go on then  . . . . . thought it was impossible . . . . show me!"

If yer haven't got a hubby or he is out at the 'boozer' you'll just have to use your charm or beg, steal or borrow some underpants and trousers LOL.

Unfortunately, regarding this miraculous trick, this particular pleasure in life has been denied to me because now I am the proud owner of an artificial hip joint and there is no way I could do this without dislocating my entire left leg, which might fall off.  I don't like cheating because if my entire left leg did fall off then I could do this easily. So I'll abstain - that's my story and I'm sticking to it LOL.

This trick may not be quite as dazzling an escape as from a straight jacket, suspended by a flaming rope over a lion's den, but it's a lot safer and, with practice, can be an excellent party feature.  The key to success is elasticity, so stretchy pants are best.  The cotton shorts type are hopeless and my own laboratory experiments reveal that those with a Y at the front are the ones to go for.

Rules:
You are allowed to bend your body and to stretch or twist your underpants. But tearing holes in any of your clothes is strictly forbidden. You can increase your chances of success by wearing loose trousers and pants but only one size up from normal - otherwise you shall be disqualified as a cheat.

Methodology:
1.  Begin by standing upright with legs slightly apart in the military Stand At Ease position.
2.  Placing the index and second fingers of the right hand inside the seam of the left inside leg , drag the trouser leg up with the help of the left hand, as far as it will go, exposing your bare thigh.
3.  Reach up inside the trouser leg until you can pinch the material of your underpants between your index and second fingers.  If you're struggling here, be of good cheer, for by pushing your left arm down the waistband of your trousers you can help things along.
4.  Grasping the underpants with the first two fingers of your right hand, pull firmly on the material until the waistband slips over your left hip (under your trousers) and the left leg hole of your pants appears outside the trouser leg. If you hear a nasty tearing noise, you break wind or lose your balance and fall over at this stage I am sorry. Also please refrain from answering the front door if the bell rings at this crucial stage - not a pretty sight!
5.  Pull the leg hole and waistband down over the bent left knee and secure your pants there for a moment while you take a breather.  If you are 'panting' then you are not very fit.
6.  Keeping the left leg bent, pull the pants over your foot and slip it out of the left leg hole and waistband.  Release the material so that the pants spring back up inside your trousers.  Be careful that the tense elastic does not cause your pants to fly up so fast that your 'pride and joy' is injured (if you are a male of course - I should hate to be the indirect cause of ruining anyone's marital prospects).
7.  It should be plain sailing from here.  By reaching up inside the right trouser leg, you should be able to grasp the material of your pants and simply slide them down your leg and off your foot with a flourish.  Job done! If the front door bell rings in all probability it is the men in white coats calling to take you away.

It is possible to put your underpants back on by reversing the sequence of moves.  Or you could just do it in the normal way, like an ordinary human being.

So now you know. It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase, "Getting one's knickers in a twist".



When I finally get some more time I am planning to do some more Freddie Bluelights analyses on why men's and women's brains work differently and the consequences.  These will be as sequels to those studies already done.


I must do the conclusion of the Eddie's feet saga - remember the Grim Reaper was threatening a hostile takeover of Eddie.  How did Eddie deal with that?  . . . . watch this space!

Plus, one fine day I will revive The Wizard Of Oz . . . . a big ask at the moment.


Talking of rattling - my teeth are!!  It's so cold here in UK and I am told in Scotland temperatures are forecast to drop to -20 degrees C.  Not nearly as bad as that here in Southern England around Bristol. I sympathise with the animals that hibernate and if I could I would. I feel I should put on some long Johns, a pullover, a night cap, some socks and go to bed with only my nose showing above the duvet. Good night!  . . . . . . "Zzzzzzzzzzz"