The Sunday Roast

Why Mimi We Had No Idea You Could Make All That Noise!

We thought you were a quiet girl . . . and no need to hide . . . . we can see you . . . "blowing your own French Horn again!" LOL

Doe, Ray, Mimi, Fa, So, La, Te, Doe

No wonder you are all 'puffed out' and hiding behind those shades!

GET ON WITH THE ROAST, EDDIE, WE'RE STARVING!

OK

Now wait a minute . . . . now we recognise you, and I just love the smell of lavender . . . .

This week's interview is with Mimi,
who writes the blog, MimiinDublin

Thank you for the interview, Mimi

A very warm welcome to you and your followers

Here's the first of the standard questions. Why do you blog?

Cos it massages my ego!

Well, sort of...I love connecting with people and reading comments, both on my own blog and on other people’s.

Sometimes, I write a post, and after hitting publish, think “that was rubbish, nobody will want to read it”. Then some lovely comments come in, and you think “yea, this is why blogging is good”.

(It's really great when that happens, isn't it?)

What's the story behind your blog name?

I started blogging to write about my journey back to music, but quickly found that connecting with people was what it was all about, for me.

I had this blog called beginner musician, but then I lost it- I know very little about the techie side of blogging! So I started another, and blogger suggested the name mimi-mimi’s world, and I took it. For a long time, I felt it was narcissistic, and wanted to change it, but didn’t know how.

With the thoughts of this Roast going live, I was motivated to get help and change!!

And, because I’m proud of being Irish, and of Dublin, my home town, the name now is mimiindublin.

What is the best thing about being a blogger?

It’s the “connecting with people” thing again - you can make friends all over the world, you can read and comment on posts at any hour without disturbing people. I’m a late-night owl, and most people don’t like getting texts or phone calls at 1 or 2 am!

So I lost all my friends, and had to make new ones by blogging! Lol

(I cannot believe you could lose any friends . . . . unless of course you give them a blast with your French Horn!)

What key advice would you give to a newbie blogger?

I’m not really qualified to give people advice, but just enjoy yourself and don’t insult anyone!

(Actually that is some of the best advice I have seen from a 'roastee' to date)

What is the most significant blog post you've ever read?

That’s a hard question, Eddie, I’m sizzling now on your Roast, so I’ll tell you 3 and hope you’ll turn down the heat on this spit.

(There we go again - I ask for two and you give me three! Do you ladies feel there should be a permanent special BOGOFF promotion? LOL. Only kidding!)

David Mc Mahon’s farewell (and I’m still hoping that he’ll return some day).

I was fairly new to blogging, and really enjoyed reading David’s posts and looking at his wonderful photography. The day I logged on and saw the words “that’s it Folks” I just couldn’t believe it!

Because I had only just discovered his blog, I felt as though I had arrived at a fantastic party just as everyone was leaving! I left him a comment to that effect. And I have checked back regularly, just in case he’s back and my “blogs I’m following” thingy is not working.

(Yes, Mimi, we ALL miss David who helped so many bloggers. For those who do not know I did a special roast edition for David to celebrate the 100th Sunday Roast. In this he expands the reasons for his decision to quit blogging. We all hope he will return one day. Well worth a read - for those who missed it press HERE)

My second choice is Maggie May’s post, Back Today, after her first lot of chemo just cut through my heart.

(Mine too, Mimi, because as you know she is my big sister and I love her to bits)

I suppose cancer is a big fear for us all, and thinking of a friend going through this was terrible. Maggie’s posts, detailing the chemo, have all been significant for me; even though we’ve never met, I feel a connection to her, and I have learned a lot from her experience. I hope and pray for a long and healthy life for Maggie from now on.

(Thank you, Mimi, let's hope our prayers are answered - many people in Blogland are helping in this way)

My third choice is this post called Home by Amy at She Writes.

There is something so beautiful, so hopeful in it, and the accompanying photographs are the icing on the cake. I could read Amy’s writing forever.

What is the most significant blog post you've ever written?

I’m not much of a writer, I think I just rattle on, post a few photos of Ireland, and connect with people. (there’s the” connect “ word again!).

(Well it's a very appropriate word - very true)

However, there is one post that I thought about a lot before I hit the publish button:

The blog post was called Letter To My Mother/ If I could Get A Plane To Heaven . It was a big decision to share those feelings with the world of blogging, and the response I got was fantastic- so sensitive, so understanding.

(I am looking forward to reading it, Mimi)

If you were to suggest two blogs for roasting who would you pick, and why?

Eddie, there are two problems here:

A lot of the bloggers that I follow have already been roasted by you or David, and it’s hard to select two, so here are a few that I enjoy having a ceili to - if you know what I mean? I hope they won’t shun me forever for putting them through this agony, ouch! But if I don’t give you the information you’re looking for, you’ll probably just turn up the heat!

(That's right! I am turning up the heat anyway . . . . because I am a nasty cruel interviewer! But wait - I ask for two and she gives me five!! Oh I see! In the instructions I say add more than two if you wish. Actually, thank you for these - I will contact them. And you are quite right that most of the people we visit have been roasted and that makes finding new people even harder - so everyone please keep your suggestions coming)

Hookin', Knittin' & Livin' because Stephanie is good fun and she posts really interesting stuff.

The B in Subtle. Nancy writes in a beautiful way about her Sonshine and her life as a Mom.

That Ridiculous Girl. She has some hilarious stories of life in an American classroom, and some serious ones of a summer doing volunteer work in Africa.

And these two for the photography:

A Little Piece Of Me. Kerri has a connection with nature that brightens my spirit every time I see one of her photographs.

Carletta's Captures. Carletta also posts some amazing photographs, and I love visiting her.

That concludes the formal aspect of the interview but it would be nice to get to know you a little better while you are slowly turning on the roasting spit. So while you are screaming in agony above the open fire here are a few more questions for you.

Pick three things you can't live without (no you cannot have ice cubes to cool you down)

Hubby and 3 kids. I don’t write much about them, cos they wouldn’t like that, but they are my world. I just love them to bits.

Chocolate - I have some lovely chocolate fridge magnets; one of my favourites is “I’d give up chocolate but I’m no quitter”. That sums me up- can’t imagine a day without chocolate!

Aromatherapy - just couldn’t imagine life without my beloved oils! Doing an Aromatherapy course was definitely one of the best decisions I ever made.

If we were to make a movie about blogland, what would it be and who would you cast in the leading roles?

Wouldn’t that be so much fun!!

Ok, I’m not great on movies, I usually fall asleep at them.!

But how about Mama Mia? You could have Pierce Brosnan’s role (see, I can’t even remember the character’s name!) and I’d let you pick everyone else!

(It's Sam Carmichael, lucky blighter! . . . . . and you're making me pick everyone else!! You lazy creature!! This casting I now have to do is way beyond the scope of this roast so I will have to do a post on it . . . . watch out for it on Eddie's blog. Crumbs another job I have to do! You're worse than Mrs Bluelights)

If you could live your life again who would you be, and why?

I would be myself, cos I’m happy with the deal that I got. Some of my life has been tough, but nobody sails through - we all get tough times, and it’s how we deal with it that counts. Having good friends to lean on is a great blessing that I’m always grateful for.

(Well spoken, Mimi. We all should settle for what we've got . . . . some of these celebrities could learn a lot from us)

You have been given a wonderful talent from above. This causes you to make your mark on humanity and be world famous. In which area would prefer: a best selling novelist, a brilliant artist, a gifted musician, a fantastic singer, a charismatic leader, anything you choose, and why?

All of them!

(You greedy thing! Oh I expect you'd love to play Mozart's Horn Concerto, wouldn't you? Which one? This one! LOL)



( . . . . . . . tell us, Mimi, have you pinched this chap's French Horn?
Sorry, I interrupted, please continue!)

Ok, stop this thing sizzling me and I’ll tell you one, OUCH!

The musician - I turned my back on music when I was 15, and only came back to playing 5 years ago. I just love it! So I think that to be a gifted musician and to give people so much pleasure would be fantastic. However, gifted musicians do practice a lot too - I recently went to see Leon Fleischer in concert. He developed Dystonia, which hits classical musicians and is, in some sense, the body’s reaction to all that practice. Leon lost, overnight, the use of 2 fingers on his right hand. He spent the next 40 years overcoming this condition, and it was magical to hear him play now, at age 82!

(Would be great to hear him)

If you were an ice cream cone, which flavour would you prefer and who would you most want to lick you?

I’d be chocolate cookie dough! And I think I’d just lick myself!

(Sensible answer to a silly question)

Describe in one sentence your perfect day

Breakfast of croissants sitting in the sun, picnic lunch on a walk in the mountains, with my lover reading poetry to me and holding my hand, evening in a superb concert hall in Vienna, with lots of champagne, knowing that the following day was going to be more or less the same! Perfect!

(Your imagination does you credit)

If you were a fictional writer which one would you be and why?

Charlotte Bronte - powerful, independent woman!

What was your most embarrassing moment?

There have been lots, but one that sticks out? As a teenager, being seen licking a plate (ice cream!) by my brother’s friend. Luckily, I didn’t fancy him, but I was afraid he’d tell everyone what he’d seen me doing!

(It's fun to recall these moments which at the time beckon you to crawl into the largest dark hole you can find. I'll tell you mine one day!)

And finally if you have answered all these questions I invite you to ask me one in return - it's the least I can do. OK fire away!

What was your worst moment as an ambulance driver? If it’s too gorey, then tell us your funniest moment.

It's not really gorey because I was in patient transport and not A&E where the really gorey work was, and I heard some very hair raising stories.

I have so many funny stories which I am dieing to post. One which comes to mind is during training when I was faced with what to do with a hyperthetical injured motor cyclist, played by a fellow student. She was wearing a skid lid (a crash helmet) and all the leathers and she was positioned right next to a fence, and when we entered the scene that is what we saw. A colleague and I had to make an assessment as to how to manage the situation. We decided that my colleague would hold her head still which is vital and I would take off her helmet, Then we planned fitting head restraints and strapping her to a board to keep her head still to prevent possible neck injuriy. I was carefully trying to ease the helmet off her head with little success when she opened her eyes and whispered between her teeth, "Undo the strap, Eddie, you're pulling my head off!" Fortunately the examiner did not notice this slight oversight LOL.

Thank you again Mimi - this was great fun and keep playing that horn!

I have posted a 'special' on my second blog, Plato's Procrastinations, featuring the gentlemen responsible for the French Horn on the You Tube. Press HERE to read about Michael Flanders and Donald Swann. Their other famous song is, "I'm a GNU, how do you do!"

______________________________________________

Today's Sunday Roast with Mimi is the 126th in a weekly
series of interviews with bloggers from around the world. ______________________________________________

This interview will feature in The Roll of Honour
for all published Roasts. To view press HERE
______________________________________________

Eddies Feet Are Undefeated! Sequel Post

For those who missed part one and would like to read why on Earth I started all this, please press HERE . Others may consider it may be time to call those men wearing white coats, to take me away.

"Where's Eddie gone? I've got a bone to pick with him . . . and it's not his new lifeless hip joint bone either! Isn't he just a bone head! As usual he's left us standing here like a couple of squashed lemons! When will the man learn?"

"Squashed lemons indeed . . . speak for yourself duckie! . . . . although I must admit you look a bit swollen, dearie. But hey! . . . . . . our legs are much better aren't they, both above and below the knees. Those antibiotics Eddie took must have worked!"

"Well maybe so but we're going to teach that Eddie a lesson - how dare he speak to us like that! . . . and various other body parts of his are none too pleased either with the workload he is throwing at them. They are all creaking at the joints, or puffed out! Only this morning they were moaning and groaning and saying they were going to have it out with him once and for all, but he just breezes in and makes a sarcastic reply and takes not a blind bit of notice! No doubt they will let him have it in due course. He will get his come-uppance - he deserves it! "

"Yes, it's about time we all put our foot down! - ouch!"


"Careful brother, no need to stamp in a tantrum in your condition!"

"Tantrum indeed! I'll have you know I'm feeling a lot better and come to think of it you look like you've been kick started a bit as well! Not quite as flat-footed as you usual, I notice."

"Flat-footed indeed! How dare you? Wash your mouth out, you heel! . . . . Oh I forgot you haven't been able to see your Achilles tendon for weeks!"

"You cheeky rascal! I'll have you know I could show you a clean pair of heels any day of the week!"

"You'd be hopping mad to try, and by rascal do you by any chance mean canille? I think the latter is a French word which may mean rascal, but Eddie has failed so far to find a literal translation . . . . . seems to ring a few bells though! Eddie has been called that a few times - it's the Mr Hyde in him you see!"

"What a lot of nonsense you are talking! Have not a clue what you're on about! . . . . but listen! I thought I had enough to contend with, without you putting in your penny's worth, and having to deal with that cruel Eddie who makes us stand for hours doing aimless tasks like painting and decorating, polishing the front door brass furniture, doing the cleaning, vacuum cleaning and cleaning the windows - let alone cleaning the cars, digging the garden and cutting the lawns - for starters! . . . when all he wanted to do was sit down with a cup of coffee, put his feet up and to use his brain and write some creative blog posts!"

"Putting his feet up, eh! sheer bliss . . . but listen, I'm only pulling your leg about being flat footed - you are very touchy aren't you? We have always worked together, except you are a bit thick sometimes, not knowing your left from your right, so during Eddie's schooldays in the Army Cadet Force, Eddie sometimes led off with his right foot instead of his left when the Sergeant Major yelled, "By the left, quick march!" Remember, they all thought Eddie was a bit of a thicko! and it was you all the time, getting him into trouble . . . . . ha! ha!"

"I always have been the extrovert one and the fly by night right foot and I suppose people think of you as being boring, dreary, half dead left foot thing you are! I was the leg Eddie used to take off when he did the high jump and long jump at his school athletics - you just trailed behind and invariably kicked off the cross bar being the lazy article you are. But don't take it all too seriously and as for all the jobs it's not really his fault, is it? It's Mrs Bluelights and her endless do lists. He calls her Sybil you know; the one from Fawlty Towers. The one who keeps bossing Basil around. The poor chap can't even sit down and take the weight off us and write a decent blog post these days. He says there just aren't enough hours in the day and he feels a bit like Cinderella with all he jobs she has to do. You know, just like Cinders before she is allowed to go to the ball. And talking of balls, he dreams of dancing with that nice Cajun lady with big green eyes, and waltzing with her all night long! Remember? You know the one he asked us to play footsie with . . . and always laughs at his comments!"

"That's bad English! Instead of ' . . . . asked to play footsie with', don't you mean, 'The one with whom he asked us to play footsie!' Phrased like that she might have agreed! But she always delights in tantalising him and really gives him the run around. But listen! . . . . I have it by good authority she really likes him but dare not encourage him too much . . . . sensible girl if you ask me!"
"Well he can't dance with her all night, so there! I just will not stand for it! (and neither will she probably! LOL) . . . . and by the way, you've changed your tune. You sound as though you and Eddie are the best of buddies all of a sudden when just now you were all for putting the boot in! Don't you remember what you said a few sentences ago?

"Wait! Here he comes . . . watch out Eddie's about and he looks decidedly sheepish. I wonder what he's been up to!"

"Oh hello you two! Glad I found you, although I cannot feel you too well these days. It's as though a pair of flip flops are permanently stitched onto my ankles!"

"How dare you!"

"Only kidding, and glad you are getting better. But listen, Mrs Bluelights is on the warpath again, she can kill a man at ten paces. Quick look busy! She can detect any man, particularly me, or legs for that matter, not working at some fruitless task, five miles away! Oh hello my lovely little Piranha Fish. Yes I am attending the list of jobs you kindly presented me at the breakfast table this morning! I shall attend to these as soon as I can galvanise these lazy feet into action and muster a modicum of activity from my other sleeping body parts who erroneously think they are entitled to a well deserved period of convalescence after my serious surgery. Yes dear! yes! yes! of course! yes! No dear! Yes dear! No dearest! Yes . . . and while I am at it, would you like me to move the house a little to the left? . . . . or to the right? Yes I know you are going out and I shall start the work I was doing when you telephoned me to ask me to do the job I was already doing! What's the point? I mean, I am doing it, aren't I? Why, when I am doing something you have asked me to do, do you stop me doing it in order to ask me to do something I was doing before you stopped me doing it and then interrupt me yet again to ask me why I am not doing something I am already doing and you seem to think I am not doing? I mean, what's the point? It's perfectly Sybil . . . . simple here or should I say my simple feet are feeling a lot better and can now stand a little extra activity. No I shall not mention again that kind, adorable and thoughtful Marguerite, with whom you disagree, who advises me to stay off my feet and put my feet up which I dare not do because I am not in the mood to start World War Three. Yes . . . . of course . . . . . yes . . . . no . . . . yes . . . . why not indeed! Yes. . . . . . No . . . . . Yes, light of my life! Yes, I realise we can enjoy ourselves when the work is done but it is a bit like painting the Fourth Bridge - when it's finished, it's time to start again - so we shall never have the time! Bye darling!"

"Quick, listen feet! I've just had a monumental row with my brain . . . . and my heart . . . . . and my lungs, and of course I have to escape the evil clutches of Mrs Bluelights and her endless array of orders, instructions and commands. And to cap it all my arms began waving around uncontrollably in sympathy and punched me on the nose, making my mouth roar with laughter! They are all ganging up on me, assisted by my kidneys and liver and anyone else they can muster to fight against me in their mutiny. Only my head, neck and backbone remain loyal to me. The mutineers have called an emergency Board Meeting and say they intend to raise a vote of no confidence in me as their Chairman and Chief Executive. Can I rely on you support? I mean you have supported me all my life, haven't you, on and off? And you would be lost without your Eddie. He is your spirit and without him you would be a couple of wandering, aimless limbs!"

"You mean without us you would be legless!"

"Listen . . . . I must get this sorted before Mrs Bluelights returns . . . . . it gets worse! My brain informs me that because I have been utterly irresponsible and not let you rest as most of the world has advised, an unwelcome character has emerged during this period of slight physical weakness."

"Why should we listen to you now? You always put on a Mr Nice face when you want something or are under severe pressure, just relax and enjoy yourself a bit more."

"Listen! People in Cajun country enjoy themselves! Other people enjoys themselves! I used to enjoy myself! I work! It is decreed by she who must be obeyed! I wanted to relax with you and watch the World Cup, watch Wimbledon, watch England beat Australia again at rugby! Not a chance! The last rugby match I watched was in 1974 and before that a cricket match between England and The West Indies when Mrs Bluelights inquired whether they were the all blacks, to which I replied, probably"

"Well you should put your foot down with a firm hand! What is this other news anyway?"

"I can't get you to put your foot down, can I? You would only complain and winge! Now listen . . . . and respect your elder, one who is older and wiser than you two!"

"You must be balmy! Older and wiser? How do you work that one out? We are all the same age!"

"No we're not! Was I a breech baby? No! Therefore you, my feet were not born first! It was my head, where I reside, who saw this world first, so therefore I am your senior and you should do as I say, as your lord and master!"

"What a load of tosh!"

"Listen! This is urgent! Your cousin, my brain, tells me we have received a hostile takeover letter from The Grim Reaper, hence another reason for the Emergency Board Meeting. He has spotted that Eddie is not immortal after all and he is waiting in the wings and biding his time. We are going to fight this chap tooth and nail and I want you both to kick the living daylights out of him."

(To be continued)

The Sunday Roast

What in the world is A Kaishon?

I have a real treat for us this week with some stunning phography from a very well known and liked blogger. Aren't these photographs absolutely brilliant?


Life with Kaishon is written by Becky

who lives in a Philadelphia Suburb in Pennsylvania.


Life With Kaishon is a blog about the adventures of her son and her family.

Thank you for the interview, Becky.

A very warm welcome to you and your followers

Here's the first of the standard questions. Why do you blog?

It is so fun to share our days with the world!

I loved my friend Gretchen’s blog and I wanted to have something to share like this with my own little muffin!

My son can look back someday and see what we used to do when he was little! I love that.

What's the story behind your blog name?

Can you believe there is no story? I needed a name and that just came to mind so I zapped it in and now we are stuck with it.

What is the best thing about being a blogger?

I have met so many sweet blogging friends. I love the community and the friendships. Blogging has made my life richer.

What key advice would you give to a newbie blogger?

Have fun. Make it snappy! Put a picture in your post.

(Stunning photographs, Becky)

What is the most significant blog post you've ever read?

The birth story of Nella Cordelia.

Do not read unless you are prepared to cry.

What is the most significant blog post you've ever written?

Wow. Most significant?

Here’s to kids who are different by Digby Wolf.

Then a new one by me.

If you were to suggest three blogs for roasting who would you pick, and why?

Grandma J is one of my most favorite bloggers. She is the fun and quirky Grammy you had when you were growing up and she will always make you smile! Communal Global is a great blog. Lola from Utah created it and it is a fun way to view the world each day thru the eyes of women all around the globe! Drew from Happy Chaos is an outstanding photographer and a fun blogger. She is a great person to meet and visit. I never click away without a smile on my face.

{This picture taken by Drew}

That concludes the formal aspect of the interview but it would be nice to get to know you a little better while you are slowly turning on the roasting spit. So while you are screaming in agony above the open fire here are a few more questions for you.

Pick three things you can't live without (no you cannot have ice cubes to cool you down)

Things and not people? If it was people that would be so easy (Jesus, Kaishon, my Family)

I could not live without my camera, my black yoga pants or my coconut coffee from Dunkin Donuts!

(Beautiful answer, Becky)

If we were to make a movie about blogland, what would it be and who would you cast in the leading roles?

A movie about blogland? How about we write a book instead. In the book we would all think that we loved the other bloggers and then we would meet in real life and be intensely disappointing.

(You most probably have a point there)

If you could live your life again who would you be, and why?

I have loved this life so very much. I don’t think I would change. I would make myself skinny though! : )

(Great that you are so pleased with life as it is - a lot of you fellow roastees are of the same opinion)

You have been given a wonderful talent from above. This causes you to make your mark on humanity and be world famous. In which area would prefer: a best selling novelist, a brilliant artist, a gifted musician, a fantastic singer, a charismatic leader, anything you choose, and why?

I would pick brilliant photographer. I think the beautiful thing about life is that all of us ARE given a talent from above. We have to make our lives count in whatever way we can and find our talent!

(I think you are already a brilliant photographer and I am sure every reader will agree)

If you were an ice cream cone, which flavor would you prefer and who would you most want to lick you?

I like pistachio! Green is my favorite color. Plus, I am totally nutty! I suppose my sweet husband Gary could lick if he wanted :) all other lickers need to stay far away because that would creep me out!

(And quite right too!)

Describe in one sentence your perfect day

One sentence? Oh my.
Vacation with all the ones I love.

If you were a fictional writer which one would you be and why?

I have to pick a writer too?
Oh me. Oh my! What will I do?
I like Shel Silverstein, and Eric Carle-
Who, oh who’s identity should I borrow?
Dr. Suess would win today-tis True.Tis true!

(Love your highly original reply - you're a poet and we didn't know it!)

What was your most embarrassing moment?

I have done so many embarrassing things in my life. Here is a post about one of them… Unbelievable (no pictures in this post!)

(I'm off to have a read and to enjoy some more of your fantastic photographs)

And finally if you have answered all these questions I invite you to ask me one in return - it's the least I can do. OK fire away!

Do you visit blogs every day?
What is your favorite thing about blogging Eddie?

That's two questions! Can't you ladies count? LOL
I visit blogs when, and as often, as I can, yet unfortuantely I have insufficient time to devote to blogging in general at the moment. I hope this will be rectified when our major house refurb is complete and when I am FULLY restored to full health after my hip replacement operation. Sunday Roast work is quite time consuming and I am pleased to say I am managing to keep that going but it is a bit frustrating that I cannot fully crack on with more writing and visiting.
To answer your second question, my favorite thing about blogging is getting to know people, making them laugh (or cry) and generally inter-relate with bloggers. I have made some really great bloggy friends. I also want to find time to write up my ambulance stories and other events experienced in my life.

Thank you for this fun interview! I will end with a quote as I do in many of my own posts:

‘Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.’ ~Plato

(A great Plato quote - we should all say this every day, as soon as we awake. Thank you again Becky for your wonderful interview. It is a privilage to have you on the show)

_____________________________________________________

Today's Sunday Roast with Life With Kaishon is the 125th in a
weekly series of interviews with bloggers from around the world. _________________________________________________

This interview will feature in The Roll of Honour for all
published Roasts. To view press HERE __________________________________________________

Have A Heart

I just wanted to post something before my next roast, Life With Kaishon, to let my blogging buddies know Eddie is alive and feeling much better. My legs and feet continue to improve, although my feet are still swollen, particularly the right one. I am still busy and I have not been able to venture into Blogland very often.
So I wanted to show my mug and say a simple, "I love you" to all my blogging buddies.

You've heard of reading tea leaves, but how about this?

Even the coffee stains show I have a big heart!

Whilst writing I am listing some previews of coming attractions which I will address as soon as I am free and able:

The continuing saga of Eddie's legs, as told by his complaining feet. For those who missed the first part press HERE

In part two Eddie's feet continue to complain and they bring in other body parts to really lay it on the line to Eddie that he MUST put his feet up (and of course Mrs Bluelights won't let him LOL). An unwelcome and threatening stranger appears! Watch this space!!

* * * * * * * *

Marguerite kindly passed two awards to me a while ago and I intend to have an award ceremony on a BOGOFF basis. If you buy one - you get one free!!

Once again thank you, cher

* * * * * * * * *

I do intend to revive The Wizard Of Oz at some point but at the moment that is a big ask.

* * * * * * * * *

And of course Freddie Bluelights has some important lessons as to why ladies speak 21,000 words a day to our 7,000. And the answer is not just because us men can't get a word in edgeways, either.

* * * * * * * * *

I have listed all the Stanley Holloway Monologues in the form of a Contents Page on my third blog, used for ridiculous things - becoming of an increasing necessity these days LOL. It takes a special mind like Socrates to handle such matters which are well outside the capability of both Eddie and Plato, so a while ago I launched my blog Socrates' Soliloquies. The monologues themselves appear on my second blog, Plato's Procrastinations. But here is the great news - I have found a lot of monologues not recorded by Stanley and I shall be posting these on Plato when people return from their summer vacation.

* * * * * * * * *

The Sunday RoastI am pleased to report that I have started receiving some new roasts, after recently getting perilously close to running out. Please keep them coming and . . . . there are some great ones in progress. Please support the column as best you can. Thank you.

The Sunday Roast

Barrington Enoch Newsdesk: His views are your news

This week's interview is with Barry Enoch Newsdesk
who writes the blog Barry Newsdesk .

Thank you for the interview, Barry

A very warm welcome to you and your followers

Here's the first of the standard questions. Why do you blog?

I blog for a whole host of reasons, chief among which is my innate generosity. I have always been generous, even as a nipper back in Lincoln. Mum, for whom my feelings of love are stronger than the magnetic forces that enshroud and retain the globe in atmosphere, always used to say ‘Barry, you’ve got a generous spirit, but sometimes you’ve got to look after number one’. I feel the world would be a poorer place without the words of Barry Newsdesk.

(That's what I like - a touch of modesty! - a man after my own heart!)

What's the story behind your blog name?

When I started out on the road to blog superstardom back at the start of 2009 with my first post, Hello Blogosphere, I was at a crossroads in my life. The recession was kicking in and I had been forced out of my fulltime sales job. In truth, this was the best thing that could ever have happened to me. I was coasting through life really, I wanted a new challenge. I thought that there was something noble in the dying art of journalism, so I decided that I would become the voice of News. Citizen Journalism is the future of the newsdesk – and my name is Barry.

(Both interesting and a touch sad about the redundancy which brings back painful memories to me - I think your first post deserves more than zero comments! I suggest we all read it and make a comment now . . . . after your comment on this roast! I've just done it)

What is the best thing about being a blogger?

There are so many great things about being a blogger. The hours, the enormous salary lol ;-) In all seriousness though, the best thing for me about being a blogger is receiving the adulation of my followers. I sometimes think that I know how it must felt to be Jesus Christ having people hang on my every word.

(Hm! Not sure if any of us really know how He felt, but a good answer)

What key advice would you give to a newbie blogger?

It won’t surprise you to learn that I’m regularly asked for advice from would-be Blogstars. One of my most loyal and favourite followers, Mess (a French Chelsea fan, but I don’t hold it against him), was so inspired by Barry Newsdesk that he took it upon himself to create a blog. I remember telling Mess early doors that it didn’t matter than no one appeared to be reading his words or indeed that no one appeared to really care about his views – he just needed to keep on blogging and as sure as night follows day, people would start following his blog. I was wrong, it turns out, no one bothered and in the end he gave up. So, I think the advice that I’d give a newbie blogger now is to take some time out to evaluate whether you’ve got what it takes to storm Castle Blogodron – and if you’ve not got it, cut your losses and set up a Twitter account.

(LOL - It does take a long time to storm Castle Blogbodron. The best way is to visit and to comment on other's blogs. Alas I cannot devote sufficient time to this these days.)

What is the most significant blog post you've ever read?

I assume that you mean the most significant post I ever read that was not by me? If I had to pick one then I suppose it would be one by my most significant blogging advocate Mr London Street . Getting a name check on his blog results in a guaranteed hit rate boost, an increased number of followers, and for me I also ended up getting a spot on The Sunday Roast.

The most significant thing that he has written was the second time Breaking the news. That was the week that Blogged, in as many weeks that he awarded yours truly a gong on his brilliant series That Was The Week That Blogged.

What is the most significant blog post you've ever written?

There are so many contenders for the crown that it is impossible for me to judge on a purely qualitative basis. However, on quantitative basis the most significant post I wrote was when I blew the lid on the impending separation of Cheryl and Ashley Cole, entitled Cheryl Cole Dumps Ashley. I beat all of Fleet Street’s finest to the scoop, and the story went viral across a number of celebrity and Chelsea football club forums generating thousands of hits and an unprecedented number of comments. Ironically, it was one of the fastest posts I’ve ever written, but then they say it only took Michael Jackson five minutes to write Billie Jean.

If you were to suggest two blogs for roasting who would you pick, and why?

The first blog I would pick is From Little Acorns by Donna. She’s a long time blogger, although I have to note she’s not been very active since January 2010 – so maybe a roasting would do her good. That’s not why I’m picking her though, I’m picking her because she was the first fellow blogger to follow Barry Newsdesk way back in January 2009. See my post, Another Follower.

(I've just checked on Donna's From Little Acorns and she has moved her blog to a Wordpress address, knitsamadworld.)

I’d also like to give an honourable mention to Jennifer Walker . She does not have a blog that I know of, but she was my first follower – and everyone remembers their first don't they? I was inspired to write a post to celebrate my first follower, entitled A Follower.

The second blog I’d like to mention is Mr Baldy’s Lymphoma Fun . Created in 2008 by an old school friend of mine Richard Wildman. It chronicles Rich’s battle against cancer. Sadly, it was a battle that Richard did not win. But his blog stands the test of time. For anyone interested in finding out more about non-Hodgkins Lymphoma and reading Rich’s often hilarious take on the world – get yourself over to the site. Clearly, Rich isn’t really in a position to respond to the questions posed on The Sunday Roast but his lovely wife Sam is keeping the blog and Rich’s memory alive.

(Thanks Barry for your recommendations . . . . and I will visit Sam as well.)

Pick three things you can't live without (no you cannot have ice cubes to cool you down)

My Mum – for whom my feelings of love are well documented on the pages of Barry Newsdesk.
Cobra Beer – it’s not gassy, that’s the secret.
Blogging – without which there is little point.

If we were to make a movie about blogland, what would it be and who would you cast in the leading roles?

It’s be a remake of Citizen Kane called Citizen Journalist. Written, directed and starring Barry Newsdesk.

(WHAT! No part for ME!)

If you could live your life again who would you be, and why?

I’m not sure I understand this question. Are you asking me which famous person from history I would like to be or whether, given another bite at the cherry, I would change my approach in order to be a different person?

If it’s the former then that’s easy, I’d be Brian Clough, if it’s the latter, well, that’s easy too – I wouldn’t change a thing!

(I really liked Brian Clough. He should have been the England Foorball Manager of that era.)

You have been given a wonderful talent from above. This causes you to make your mark on humanity and be world famous. In which area would prefer: a best selling novelist, a brilliant artist, a gifted musician, a fantastic singer, a charismatic leader, anything you choose, and why?

When I started reading this question I assumed that it was going to be statement of fact since I believe that I really do have a wonderful talent and am making my mark on humanity ;-)

(Love it!)

Actually, I’d like to be a world-class footballer since it would enable me to make millions of pounds doing something I love and have sex with an almost limitless supply of beautiful women. Or, maybe I’d be a pornstar, which would enable me to have sex with an almost limitless supply of beautiful women without having to not drink heavily on a Friday night.

(Pity I played Rugby!" LOL)

If you were an ice cream cone, which flavour would you prefer and who would you most want to lick you?

Cones are not normally flavoured – but putting my pedantry aside, I’d say raspberry ripple and Maria Whittaker circa 1985.

Describe in one sentence your perfect day.


Being woken up naked by Jo Guest and Maria Whittaker pouring champagne over each other’s naked bodies after a night out at Crazy Larry’s at 2:00pm in The Premier Inn near Wembley Stadium with Notts Forest and Derby County due to slug it out in the Cup Final.

(Now Barry, this is a family show - you'll get me shot and besides I doubt if my 'ticker' would stand seeing the Maria Whittaker URL you gave me. Even my computer would not let me see it! LOL)

If you were a fictional writer which one would you be and why?

Adrian Mole since he was a simple lad from the East Midlands who gained fame, fortune and popularity by pouring his heart out to the world.

What was your most embarrassing moment?

I soiled myself on a date with Fat Alice. Double whammy.

(You're joking! LOL. What did she say?)

And finally if you have answered all these questions I invite you to ask me one in return - it's the least I can do. OK fire away!

What is your fav type of crisp?

(Great question and very discerning of you to ESP that I like crisps!! . . . . . and I still don't know after eating zillions of bags, or should I say contents of crisp bags. I eat them so fast I ask myself, "What flavour was that? Cheese and Onion? Salt and Vinegar? Plain? Oh well I'd better have another one and before I know it bang goes another 26 bags! Actually I think Salt and Vinegar! Forgive me I must pop downstairs to get a bag of crisps . . or two . . . . . or ten!)

Thank you Barry for your interview - now a quick look at your blogsite screen. I see you have not posted for a while.

What is your fav type of crisp? Where did that come from? We've dealt with it! Salt and Vinegar of course! . . . . computers!!! . . why don't they listen?

__________________________________________________

Today's Sunday Roast with Barry Newsdesk is the 124th in a
weekly series of interviews with bloggers from around the world. __________________________________________________

This interview will feature in The Roll of Honour
for all published Roasts. To view press HERE
________________________________________________

The Sunday Roast

Watch Out! The FBI's About! - It's Secret Agent Woman!

Just love the outfit . . . but oh no! she's got us on film . . . .

. . . . and now she's an undercover agent!!

Ah! now I know who she is!
She works for SpecSavers!! and here is her calling card.

(No actually . . . . she is a psychologist . . . so watch it!)


This week's interview is with Secret Agent Woman
who writes the blog, Blogging Incognito .

Thank you for the interview


A very warm welcome to you and your followers

Here is the first of the standard questions. Why do you blog?

When my baby sister started up a blog, many of my family members followed suit so we could all stay in touch. But mysteriously, people outside my family found their way to me and everything changed. Coincidentally, I went through a divorce toward the end of the first year of my blog, and got more support from my readers than I could have imagined. I was hooked. The blog world has become a virtual community for me. The bog has taken me through separation and divorce dating relationships and a miscarriage, watching both my kids turn into teenagers, buying and remodeling an old-house, surgery for me and a medical scar for my younger son, and travels to Tasmania, Nova Scotia, Greece, Turkey, Puerto Rico and Mexico. It's been an interesting four years and I like to go back and review from time to time. The blog serves as an on-line journal for me, complete with lapses into metaphor and secret encoded jokes for myself. I started the blog with my own personal credo: "Life is weird and unpredictable, but often in a good way." I had no idea how much that would come to sum up my life.

(Yes, I agree the blogging community is very supportive - we all seem to help each other over life's hurdles, which is great!)

What's the story behind your blog name?

Originally, My blog was called "Another Tangential Thinker" and I just went by my initials. But I started getting some local notice that worried me, including discovering that I was in a weekly bloground-up in the local paper. No good - I'm a psychologist and value my privacy. I changed URLS and the blog name to "A Little Off Kilter" and called myself Citizen of the World.
And all was fine until three things happened: a recently discarded boyfriend googled my email address and began stalking my blog, I became increasingly unhappy with my family making assumptions about me based only on my blog, and a local blogger started making it her personal mission to out me.

I went further underground by faking my old blog's death, and sending all my posts to a new site which was exempt from search engines. Hence, Secret Agent Woman at Blogging Incognito. In fact, I do use photos of myself and my kids on occasion, and anyone who knew me would recognize it as me. But no names and I don't identify my location in the profile, so it would be hard to set out to find me.

What is the best thing about being a blogger?

Is there one best thing? The community aspects, I guess. You get to know people and care about their lives, and discover that there are people out there who have never even met you who grow to care about you. And I like the range of ages, races, genders, sexual orientations, nationalities, political leanings and spiritual viewpoints. I love that. And having a blog lead me to pick up a camera, giving me a whole new hobby of photography. All but a very few images (which I credit) are my own and carrying a camera has changed the way I look at the world.

What key advice would you give to a newbie blogger?

Be genuine. I think people really do want to have the sense that they are being let into your life. And post often enough so people don't lose track of you. On the other hand, if you post several times aday, you risk people feeling overwhelmed. Or maybe that's just me and my own personal time constraints. And finally, visit other people and leave comments. That's the surest way to bring people to your own blog and get enveloped by a supportive crowd.

(Agreed - sadly I do not have sufficient time available recently to visit and comment as often as I would like, but it does lead to building good friends and a good readership.)

What is the most significant blog post you've ever read?

Hmm. There have been many that have moved me. I can't speak to an individual post because my mind doesn't organize information in that way, but when I found Renee of "Circling My Head," I was completelydrawn into her experience of battling inflammatory breast cancer. When she died, her whole blog community grieved hard. Renee's daughter continues to post from that blog now and again at Circling My Head.

(Wonderul lady was Renee - sadly missed. She had a great sense of humour and was very kind.)

What is the most significant blog post you've ever written?

Well, who knows? I'm sure that would vary by reader. People tend to respond to posts that have personal meaning for them. I know one that was personally important was one I wrote on the anniversary of my brother's death titled Cause you know I'm Gonna Miss You Whe You're Gone, Wish I Could Hide Away.

If you were to suggest two blogs for roasting who would you pick, and why?

There are many blogs I really love, but I'll pick some who I've been following for a very long time. And I have many men in my blogroll whose blogs I thoroughly enjoy, but I'm feeling a bit of sisterly solidarity today and love these women:

KJ at Options For A Better World. KJ writes a mix of her day to day life and excerpts from her novels. As a bonus, she is working up her second annual sex survey. Fun stuff.

Jazz at Haphazard Life. Canadian and a wee bit snarky. I'm sure those two things aren't related. She also writes both about her life and commentary about what's going on in the world. Since I am a somewhat eclectic blogger myself, that blend appeals to me.

Jocelyn at O Mighty Crisis. A college English professor on the verge of a sabbatical (so, you know, not nearly enough on her plate at the moment). She and her rugged bunch seem to actually enjoy living in a very, very cold place, which I respect but do not comprehend.

That concludes the formal aspect of the interview but it would be niceto get to know you a little better while you are slowly turning on theroasting spit. So while you are screaming in agony above the openfire here are a few more questions for you.

Pick three things you can't live without (no you cannot have ice cubesto cool you down)

Love. Makes the world go round, right? I might as well face it, I'm addicted to love. Or maybe sex -hard to say.

My sons. Although I don't consider myself a "mommy blogger," my boys do feature heavily on my blog. They are kind of cool kids.

Red wine and chocolate. In July 2006 I wrote a post, titled Red wine and chocolate. Food of the gods.

If we were to make a movie about blogland, what would it be and who would you cast in the leading roles?

This is so not the way my brain works. I have no power of recall for movies or actors, nor the ability to equate an actor with a particular person. I'm going to have to pass on this one.

If you could live your life again who would you be, and why?

Well, me. Possibly me with superpowers. I like boots and flying would be cool. Invisibility would suit my current blog incarnation. But the superpower I really want is the ability to make all people incapable of hurting others.

(Now invisability would be very useful. Wonderful last sentence - I'll drink to that one.)

You have been given a wonderful talent from above. This causes you tomake your mark on humanity and be world famous. In which area would prefer: a best selling novelist, a brilliant artist, a gifted musician, a fantastic singer, a charismatic leader, anything you choose, and why?

From above? Okay, I'll set my non-theism aside for a moment. You know, I have no desire to be world famous. I mean, of course it would be great to be a really great writer or singer - but really I just want to be a good friend, a decent mother, a competent therapist, and a loving partner. Maybe be liked enough so that a few people will cry at my funeral.

(You seem a very caring person and I would think many would cry at your funeral, hopefully a long way into the future.)

If you were an ice cream cone, which flavour would you prefer and who would you most want to lick you?

Raspberry chocolate. But the licker would depend on which day you ask me. :-)

(Interesting! - and I don't think I should comment further LOL)

Describe in one sentence your perfect day.

I have two versions. One would involve going somewhere spectacular with the kids. Maybe the Galapagos or Iceland. The other would be kid-free. Lounging on a tropical island with some lovely man, with plenty of great seafood and champagne.

(Sorry, you don't get two days! - just one! Where are we going? LOL)

If you were a fictional writer which one would you be and why?

Again, I have no capacity for calling someone appropriate to mind.

(That's OK - we'll leave silly questions like this to Suldog and Knucklehead.)

What was your most embarrassing moment?

I'm not easily embarrassed and happily tell on myself all the time in my blog. I love a funny story, even if I'm the one I'm laughing at. And believe me, I do lots of foolish things. But if something truly embarrassed me, there's no way I'd reveal it here.

(I do not blame you - what a silly question! However, I think it is a mark of a good character to be able to laugh at oneself.)

And finally if you have answered all these questions I invite you toask me one in return - it's the least I can do. OK fire away!

So what made you decide to pick up a virtual pen and start blogging? And why the interviews?

(Ah I see you've sneaked in two questions, not one. Quite typical of your gender, may I say? LOL. To answer your first question, my sister Maggie May of Nuts Of May was already blogging for about a year and she told me how much she enjoyed it, for similar reasons you stated earlier. I rather fancied writing about my ambulance and life experiences so I started in January 2009. I rapidly discovered my sense of humour was popular if I injected into my posts and I was 'steered' towards funny creative writing. Today I do a mix if I can of sad posts, funny posts and life experience posts. However I am not that active at present due to huge domestic refurb projects and a 'gammy' leg. I am pleased to report my legs are much better.

Why the interviews? Good question! I was asked by David McMahon of Authorblog if I would take over his Sunday Roast column when he quit blogging in October 2009. I was honoured to be asked I accepted his generous invitation with enthusiasm. I have enjoyed keeping the flag flying and have even roasted David for the highly popular 100th Special Edition - well worth a read. The Sunday Roast is a great way of bloggers getting to know one another.

Thank you for your interesting interview - great fun.

__________________________________________________

Today's Sunday Roast with Secret Agent Woman is the 123rd in a
weekly series of interviews with bloggers from around the world.
__________________________________________________

This interview will feature in The Roll of Honour for all
published Roasts. To view press HERE
________________________________________________

Big Rumpus As Eddie's Talking Feet Protest!!!!

"What the heck is all this about?"
All who venture here will no doubt wonder.
Well, my feet can talk and by gum they are going to 'drop me in it!' as the proverbial saying goes. Hope you like it.
_______________________________________________________

"Golly you look awful! I've never seen a redder, more swollen apology for a limb for ages! And just think we both used to look great! Everyone admired Eddie's legs until a couple of years ago and now look at us, particularly you! You look dreadful!"

"You're a fine one to talk! Just look in a mirror! I don't know how you manage to support his weight when he walks - I find it a struggle and I'm stronger. And he's thrown his wretched walking sticks away, the inconsiderate so and so. It's much harder for us now and he is so demanding. He never lets us have a rest or put our feet up."

"Let's face it we both are not what we used to be, particularly after his total hip replacement in February. It was on your side and you looked pitiful and of course I had to compensate for months and months both before and after the operation because you were not up to the job. It's a wonder the poor chap didn't walk in circles, you were so useless."

"I'll kick you if you persist with these insults. You are always putting your foot in it! Remember, on the way to the operating theatre you said, 'break a leg' when a simple 'good luck' would do. Oh I'm hopping mad! Ouch! That's the last time I try that but shut up or I'll kick you! - oh! maybe not - that won't do either of us any good. Let's try to be civil to one another."

"Talking sense at last, OK. Do you remember his first steps?"

"Yes, the little lad did great, didn't he? He must have been about 6 months old. Maggie was there and remember we heard her screaming at their Mum, "Eddie's running!"

"Yes, I remember the little chap used my leg first . . . . . "

"No . . . . it was my leg!"

"No it wasn't, it was me . . . he put my left leg forward and then yours quickly, then me, then yours and then he started screaming as he raced across the room. He couldn't stop because if he did he would go base over apex! Remember he was leaning forward just like the Olympic sprinter, Valerie Borsoff!"

"He crashed into the rocking chair just as his Mum arrived and we had a good chuckle. No harm done - no bones broken and the little mite soon stopped crying."

"But he got up again and did it again and then again . . . . . over and over! He ran everywhere - into the garden and back into the house. He ran us off our feet then and has done the same ever since. He never walked, did he? He was always running. And it is the same with him in life. Still he always tries to run before he walks and it has got him into some big time trouble. You'd think he'd learn his lesson but he never does."

"Remember when he was about nine? His Mum started crying, quite out of the blue? His Daddy asked his Mother what was the matter? 'It's Eddie's legs, they are so thin, do you think they will be alright?' Do you remember we rolled on the floor laughing and poor Eddie wondered where we were taking him. He fell over and his Mum thought his legs were very weak and she started crying again."

"Will his legs be alright, indeed! He became a good runner at school, ran long distance for his house and the school. Again, we had lots of extra work but our complains went unheeded, as they always do. He just rubbed nasty horse lineament ointment into our muscles or that dreadful Deep Heat - it was awful and stunk the place to High Heaven."

"Just look at the hundreds and hundreds of miles we have carried him during his road running when he used to run on the balls of his feet. He built us up real good and we were super fit! And all the ladder work we did for him for 15 years, up and down, up and down all day long."

"Remember when the boxer dog joined him for an eight mile run and followed him all the way until he returned and the dog gave a playful half bark as a "Cheerio" and carried on his way."

"And the Alsation dog grabbing his arm like a police dog! Good job he let him go!"

"Not very fast at 100 metres and 440 was he?"

"That was you fault because my leg moved much quicker than your's - you were a lazy so and so! - and still are."

"No, I just pace myself, like Janine does now. At leat she says that on her latest post."

"Trouble with him is that he thinks he is still young, and from the waist up he is in pretty good 'nick' I suppose. His cardio vascular system at least gives us a good supply of oxygen but our veins do not work as well as they should to get the blood back to the lungs to get rid of this dreadful carbon dioxide and vile waste products."

"It's all his fault because he keeps us standing around while he does aimless tasks, hour after hour, day after day, week after week, month after month and then when he does that wretched blogging he makes us sit around motionless for hours on end - no good at all for us legs!"

"No wonder he got DVT - he didn't even make us walk him every day - that would have been much better. And as for his exercise, he's just forgotten about them because of all this refurb work."

"And as for telling us to get ready to play footsie with that charming Marguerite he is always visiting, he must be joking!"

"Yes and he is always on about this Cajun Waltz he wants us to do - he is rubbish at dancing because he has two left feet!"

"Speak for yourself! One of you is quite enough thank you. I am his right foot if you please - I keep him on the straight and narrow and I will be able to master 1,2,3 - 1,2,3 soon thank you very much."

"This gal is really giving him the run around and he just cannot see it! The man is deluding himself because he would not recognise her even if he saw her. All he has is a tiny photo of a bird in a red sports car waving at him, a lady wearing shades and another in a nice pink jumper but now off the blog. She will not show him in which videos she is dancing and she refuses to say whether she is the lady in the swimming pool shown on one of her header photos . . . . . and when once asked whether she liked the look of us when we were fit and normal she replied she would not touch that question with a barge pole!"

"And I do not blame her. But oh! he only does all this to make her laugh - he loves amusing people, especially her, and we think she enjoys a bit of fun with him. He loves pulling peoples' legs and putting people on the spot with his silly questions - just look at that idiotic ice cream one he uses on his roast . . . and he is thinking of using another one, 'You are facing a firing squad - what would be your last wish? (no you cannot ask them to calculate pi to the last decimal place.)' "

" Right, I think we have got to have all this out with him. He is doing us no good whatsoever!"

"Agreed! Shall I call him or you?"

"I'll do it!
Eddie, your right and left foot would like to have a few moments of your time if you don't mind."

"Hello! Did I detect life somewhere south of my waist? - I was beginning to wonder whether you were bereft of life and had gone to meet your maker!" "Hello! Can you hear me down there? Is there anyone there? Come on! Come on! Speak up! Come on! Come on! I haven't got all night!"

"Eddie, can we talk with you please?"

"Ahh! So there is life below the hips after all. Pardon me but I was beginning to wonder whether I was in need of learning to walk on my hands. To what do I owe the honour of this communication? Have I disturbed your slumbers or would you like me to get you a hot water bottle, or a perhaps a cold one?

"Oh dear, you're in one of your Basil Fawlty moods we see. Now listen, we think you work us too hard and we want a rest so your whole body can recover."

"Ah diddums! All is alright at this end. Is life a little difficult for you? Is breathing a little strenuous? Standing up a little difficult perhaps? Have you forgotten that to move one of you has to place your foot in front of the other and then the other must move a little later. Would you like me to draw you a picture?"

"No need to be sarcastic - it is for your own good - if you are not careful you will not have a leg to stand on!"


(to be continued)

Latest Newsflash! Folks I am pleased to say my legs are a lot better today.

Sorry Folks - My Infected Leg Means No Roast This Weekend

I must apologise that this week I am not able to post a Sunday Roast.

I have a badly infected leg, the non operated leg on which I had my hip replacement. That seems OK, I am pleased to say. Consequently I am not fit enough to get a roast ready. I think something bit me in the garden and liked the taste of Eddie's blood. However, I did not detect the flapping of vampire's wings.

Seriously I have been prescribed a powerful antibiotic, flucloxacillin, which I hope does the trick.
I went to bed early last night and slept for 12 hours and I woke up feeling very groggy with a fever like headache and with a hot leg. Funny, until recently my legs were exceptionally strong. But now I feel completely drained and my head tells me I have been overdoing things with the kitchen/house renovations for the last 4-5 weeks when I am not yet fully recovered from my operation. Still, "She who must be obeyed" and all that! LOL

My son is on holiday in Cornwall and I did his paper round this morning. Normally I would think nothing of it, but golly did I struggle with it. Jackie was talking on her blog about mail boxes and I mentioned that here in England we have a letterbox in the front door of our houses. Boy, do these kids deserve danger money!! Some people are considerate and post a notice on the front door, "Beware of the dog!" However, some don't! Dogs fall into two categories, firstly those who bark like hell, this giving timely warning that they want to bite off your fingers. However, there are crafty dogs who seem to want a silent meal - I posted the paper through a few doors and was greeted by a monster canine specimen intent on eating the paper and my hand. After the paper round I went to bed and slept for 4 hours and I shall have another early night tonight.

The last time I saw a "Beware of The Dog" notice beneath it was another warning, "Survivors will be prosecuted!" So the poor postman would have a choice of being eaten alive by a ravenous canine or being 'banged up' in the local cop shop.

Returning to the subject of The Sunday Roast I was delighted with the reception and the number of comments on Ocean Girl's roast. It makes the whole thing worth while when it elicits a response like that. However I have noticed in general interest is waning and I am wondering whether you would like me to continue with it, or have any suggestions to stimulate interest. Also whilst writing I am extremely low on roasts in the pipeline and many are taking an age to complete them. Some do not reply at all to my invitations and of course some decline. That's OK, at least I know where I stand with those.

To finish I noticed in the newspaper that Brussels has decreed that here in England we can no longer sell or buy eggs by the dozen. We must sell and buy them by the kilo. This is 'nuts' and I am fed up with Brussels telling us what to do, like what shape our bananas should be, and what size our potatoes should be. (Eddie shows his teeth on this, can you see?). Personally I think we should come out of Europe altogether and become the 51st State of America. You would then get your history back and have an honorary Queen. Our cultures are much closer that in Europe who we have been fighting for centuries. Also just look at how weak the Euro is! Poor old Germany is being dragged down and down by all these weak countries joining the EEC and here in Britain we pay handsomely for the privilege. Keep this up and Europe will never climb out of recession. These Brussels bureaucrats should be concentrating on dealing with international crime and particularly all the fraudsters who personally I think should be hung, drawn and quartered.

This was a bit longer than I intended but nothing compared to the work involved in getting a roast together. I will have one ready for next week.