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Friday 16 December 2011

13 Year Old Girl Threatens To Kill Santa

We all know Christmas in this day and age is way over the top from a commercial standpoint - it has been so for years and regrettably the main focus of Christmas has been eclipsed by presents, greed, holidays, in fact everything other than what Christmas should be about.

Not more so than this year. Of course this story, featured in newspapers and media throughout the UK, does have a funny side but in a way it is rather shocking.

I was dumb stuck when I heard this story on our local radio. But of course it tickled my sense of humour too.

Ahh! Poor Santa is crying

A 13 year old girl wrote an ultimatum letter to Father Christmas demanding at least two expensive presents on her list and warned him that if he failed to deliver she would kill him.  Further, she threatened to hunt down his beloved reindeer, cook them and serve them to homeless people on Christmas day.  (Well at least she was thinking of less fortunates LOL).  Her mother was amazed at first but vowed to meet her daughter's demands, saying, "You don't want to get the wrong side of Mekeeda!"  However, she continued that it would be rather difficult to satisfy her daughter's wish to have the real live Justin Bieber in her Christmas stocking.

Here is her letter in full.

Dear Santa

This Christmas I don't ask for much so if I don't get at least two of the things I want I will literally KILL you. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?  Oh! also I'll hunt down your reindeers, cook them and serve their meat to homeless people on Christmas day.
Nobody wants that.
So here is what I want

A Blackberry
Austin Mahone or Justin Beiber (real)
Laura Knitted 33 Jumper
High Top Converter

Remember two of these or you DIE
Love From
Makeeda Austin

Notice the affection she displays to Santa when she signs off "Love From" and even gives him some kisses before she plunges the knife in.

There were other items on the list but her hand writing was not clear so I could not read them and so I omitted them.  I do hope Santa was able to read her demands or else he might be in grave danger.   I hope he has a reliable pair of glasses from SpecSavers. She addressed the letter to Santa, Lapland, North Pole, so he is bound to receive it.

Shaking for reasons other than the cold Santa was observed to have modified his usual Christmas saying this year to, "No, No, No!" and he is considering employing Security guards to accompany him to ride shotgun when delivering presents throughout the cosmos.  He is considering kidnapping Justin Beiber in order to protect himself and says if he is arrested he will plead Self Defence.

Tracy, her mother said, "We can't have her killing Santa can we so I had better let her have what she wants".
She continued, Mekeeda is such a lovely girl but can be very demanding.  She is energetic and has to burn off all her excess energy playing sports or she can be hyperactive when she gets home.  She is the life and soul of the party - there is never a dull moment when she is around so we can forgive her for being a bit of a diva."

I wonder whether her mother's secret wish this year to Santa is for him to give this young lady a long overdue good spanking.


Whilst on the subject of Santa for those who missed it I wrote an article two years ago describing in great detail how he managed to deliver so many presents in such a small time-frame on Christmas Eve whilst consuming vast amounts of Sherry, kissing lots of Mummies under the mistletoe and managing to climb up and down chimneys at the speed of light. See HERE to read How Does Santa Do It?


  1. i had better let her have what she wants...that is the destruction of our very society there..

  2. Sounds like the "diva" needed to have a bottom swatted a few times in the past and didn't, resulting in the divaness she now exhibits! A few "no"s along the way would have helped also!

  3. First of all, what is a 13 year old doing writing a letter to Santa? They stop that around age 11.
    Her mother needs to say "NO" to her, and teach her some manners.
    I don't advocate violence (i.e. hitting her) but she can be firm and hold her ground without hitting her kids.
    I have a feeling this may be a made-up story to get publicity. Some people just love media attention.

  4. I know what she'd get from me!
    She will grow into a really horrid adult if she doesn't get a few boundaries and a bit of discipline! Too many mothers seem to give in out of fear. That is what is wrong with todays society!
    maggie X

    Nuts in May

  5. I'm with Maggie May on this one!!
    Smiles and a wish for a Merry Christmas to you and your family, Eddie.

  6. Wow, sounds like the mother is even worse than the daughter -- if only in the respect that she let this letter get out to the public. If it were my child, I'd be so devastated that they would think such a thing, how did I bring them up, and I'd be mortified and rip that letter up, nevermind showing people/publishing it! I'd also give my kid a good talking to, in addition to taking her to a psychiatrist for her anger problem!
    I'd hate to be a co-worker or neighbor of little Makeeda's when she grows up! LOL!

  7. Hahaha!! Dont mess with Makeeda. Coincidentaly nobody has seen the Tooth Fairy since he forgot to pay her for her last lost tooth a few years back!

  8. Real letter or not, what we have here is an obvious parenting issue.

    MY demands from Santa? That some parents might see themselves in this story, and mend their ways before they have an uncontrollable adult on their hands.
    Oh, and George Clooney under my tree.

    xoxoxo, cd

  9. You have got to be kidding me. Let her have what she wants??? Ack!! Diva my @@##!! She is a spoiled brat and definitely needs some good old adjustment. I would be horrified if I was her mother.

  10. Golly, that did wind up all of you, my friends. And quite right too - she deserves a slap or two on the wrist. You are all very good Mums and Dads. ~

    Brian ~ yes that is just how the nasty people are formed - no discipline.

    Eva ~ I think we all agree

    Mimi ~ Agree but I could be just a huge joke I suppose.

    Maggie May ~ Gosh, you are strict. But I agree that is just how society deteriorates.

    Teacher's Pet ~ Agree and Happy Christmas to you and family also.

    Gloria ~ Yes, I imagine just what she might be like when she is an adult

    From the mind of a madman ~ it does have its funny side, and I have often wondered what happened to the tooth fairy.

    Clare Dunn ~ Good advice but sorry George Clooney is wanted elsewhere ! LOL

    SueAnn ~ Very well put.

  11. She definitely needed that spanking a long time ago.

    Merry Christmas, Eddie!

  12. WOW! And I thought we had behavior problems with children in the US!! I guess weak parents who don't know the meaning of the word "DISCIPLINE" is a universal problem, not just an American one ;)

    If that 'young lady' is not checked soon, she will make her way to LA to continue with her delusions of grandeur but I won't be able to spot her since so many like her have come to LA already!! ;)

    Thanks for another great laugh with this post and your post from 2009 Eddie. May you and Mrs. Bluelights have a wonderful holiday season and a fantastic New Year for 2012 =-)

  13. And THAT is another reason why I don't have any kids ;-) I yiyi. That girl is a handful.

    I watched the new animated movie "Arthur christmas" today. It put me in the holiday spirit. Maybe this young lady (and her mother) should check it out.

    Wishing you and Mrs. Bluelights a very happy Christmas, Eddie. You are a real gem in Blogland and it's a pleasure getting to know you.

    Cheers, jj

  14. Like my ex-MIL used to say, "What that one needs is a good swift kick in' the behind" and the mother, too! LOL! The poor tooth fairy didn't have a chance with Makeeda. LOL Hilarious!

  15. Oh, my. Thirteen year old girls. Scary. Good think I had boys.

    Might be too late for the spanking.

    Merry Christmas to you, Eddie.

  16. I thought you just HAD to be making this all up, so I went looking and found it elsewhere. That's insane. And you can see how he girl became as demanding as she is - her mother has no backbone. I can't believe she is going to reward that kind of behavior.

  17. Merry Christmas, Eddie!
    Hope everything's great in your neck of the woods! :-)

  18. Merry Christmas dear Eddie, have a wonderful holiday with your family and I wish you, Maria and family a healthy and happy New Year...Hugs


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